After getting divorced and having to go through everything else that goes along with it, I feel inclined to share the timeless lessons that I learned so my fellow divorcees can better cope with the experience.
Having a divorce can be so devastating that many fail to get back on their feet after having faced the ordeal. If you've recently gone through one and are quite oblivious about how to cope with it, then I'm sure that these tips are what you need.
These are the things that I learned through MY EXPERIENCE and I have since obtained a different level of perspective (let alone peace) after having internalized these. I hope it does the same for you too.
Give yourself some time to mourn.
Remember. Crying is a form of healing.
Considering how painful a divorce is, you need to give yourself some time to reflect and mourn the pain. Simply smiling and acting like nothing happened after a painful divorce is close to if not an act of denial.
The more you reflect on the matter, the more pain and hurt you'll realize and feel. BUTů You'll also learn from reflecting on it helping you with the healing process.
Learn to love yourself.
It gets infinitely hard to recover from a divorce if you don't learn to love yourself.
Loving yourself is especially important in these situations since you can no longer confide in your partner. You need to see how valuable your really are start pampering yourself. You can go out with your friends, do the things that you really love to do and celebrate life!
It's when you do this that you start realizing that being divorced may not be as bad as you thought it was.
DO NOT let anger take control of your life.
The thing with anger is that it blinds and robs you of the blessings that you should've been enjoying had you been seeing things in a clearer perspective.
Instead of focusing on the opportunity of living a more peaceful life, you end up thinking about the pains and hurts that you've experienced before. You end up living the past when you're supposed to be moving on and having a better life.
Seek a life coach or a therapist.
Self-help books may not be the best option at this point. If you think you are going crazy (or your ex is pounding that idea into your breaking/broken heart), go and seek the support of experts. Therapists and life coaches know what they are talking about and have probably seen more ridiculous cases.
Take A Break.
Let your decadent self come out to play and sample an adventurous lifestyle. Go on a vacation, cruise, ski holiday or some sort of trip alone and far from old familiar things. Access the inner daredevil in you that you have kept hidden for marriage-sake. Try something new and meet new friends. Fulfill your dream vacation.
After years of tilting at windmills, here you are facing a tough task of getting through a divorce process. Moving on is not one of the options, it is your ONLY option. Are you still stuck with square one and could not summon the courage to get back on your feet? Or, are you a victor of divorce and is now enjoying a happily remarried life? Share your thoughts, ideas and true-to-life experience here. There is strength in numbers. Let's ponder on life lessons together.