2004-03-29


Warning: These Have Not Been Produced By A Real Psychic:

Aries March 21 - April 19

 A buddy might try to take advantage of your generousity by showing up at your work and begging freebies. Unless you want to be fired and end up homeless and begging on the streets, talk to your friend and maybe decide whats more important and who your real friends are. This week: Prioritize!

Taurus April 20 - May 20

You may think stalking your crush is an innocent gesture, but she/he might not agree. Be careful and obey the law. If you can not find anything more constructive to do, try studying up on one of the arts. Painting or sculpting is a stress relief. Acting is expressive. Or if all else fails, take up kick boxing. You can always fight back if her/his bodyguard are stronger than you had thought. This week: Watch your step!

Gemini May 21 - June 2

Pleading insanity only works in rare cases and this will not work in yours. It is about time you got away from those video games and actually tried to find a job. You know your life feels like a rollercoaster, but if you do not stick with it, you may want to jump off right now and take some chances. Too much play causes you to be a very lazy boy/girl. This week: Do what you gotta do, and quit procrastinating!

Cancer June 22- July 22

Following the crowd can be a good thing, but do not get too emotionally involved. Remember criticism can be used constructively too. So while you should take any given lightly, you should also feel free to give yours as well. Time to tell that babysitter just what you really think of her bringing her boyfriend over to watch your five year old. This week: Relax and watch a movie!

Leo July 23-August 22

Don't be so impulsive. If you feel offended by a close friend, don't just walk away. It is likely you misinterpreted what they really meant. You are very charming this week and you may be able to use this to your advantage. Try your luck in persuading an audience or boss of an idea or proposal. This week: This is your time in the sun!

Virgo August 23-September 23

Tired of combing, cleaning, washing, working, and getting nowhere? Quit complaining and worrying. Be creative, begin work on that new story you thought about writing. You know, that weird one about the fish and the puppet? The one you thought you'd never sell. This might just be your lucky day. Go through with it and don't wait. It could be on the shelves before you can say Pinnoci-whale. This week: Ride your bike through town and shout out your greatness!

Libra September 24- October 24

You might be feeling a little blue still from the winter. But Spring is underway and you are just bursting with creative ideas. Why not paint your room that weird shade of purple you swear goes with your eyes? You can even get your nails done to match. If you're not into that "girly" stuff, let your more masculine creativity flow and remodel the house. There will be lots of tables and chairs to refurnish to settle this urge. This week: Share your creativty with others and make a new friend!

Scorpio October 25-November 25

Time for you to discover the wonders of the digital camera. You were a born photographer. Whether you decide to take pictures of landscapes or nude women, remember to have fun. You may decide digital cameras are too expensive, but the benefits are great. No messing with film and instant pictures to place on the internet. This week: Make sure your mom does not have your computer password!

Sagittarius Nov. 26-Dec. 26

Luck will behold you as you may win the lottery without ever entering! Think that is odd? Well, the truth is that the most wonderous fortunes always come to those who least expect it! And who more deserves it than you? Afterall you have been working so hard lately. Put your newly acquired fortune to good use; buy that new swimming pool you wanted. This week: Get a hair cut, you are starting to look like Ronald McDonald!

Capricorn Dec. 27-Jan. 27

 Looking for a soul mate or someone to pass the time with? You may find that special person if you put less effort into that and let yourself go more in public places. You didn't think you'd find her/him sitting in front of the computer did you? If you already have someone, remind them how much you care. Put away those engineering books and take them to a movie or dinner. They will really appreciate the effort and this means bonus points for you. This week: Get lucky!

Aquarius Jan. 28- Feb. 20

*sighs* What are we going to do with you? You may decide society is tossing you stale bread. In this case you may move to a cave in the middle of nowhere with nothing other than your fish to keep you company. Just remember, if you leave society you cannot take your computer. Then how will you talk to the majority of your friends? This week: I dare you to go out and TALK to people!

Pisces Feb.21- March 21

 Something smells fishy, doesn't it? Many people may like your tender nature, but not so much your determined side. Unfortunately, you seem to be very determined lately. You want to have your cake and eat it too. well, here is a close exception. You can tell the people who say they admire you what your true feelings are and if they stop hanging around you it is their loss. You will become a big success and you need to watch those who put you down. They are jealous. This week: Play all day!