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Toll in devastating Atlantis attack rises to 5600

 article about atlantis
While the rest of the world is talking about minor deaths in the Middle-East area (for American people - that's near the country called Europe), The Cheers is today revealing some seriously disturbing information about the recent attack in the long lost Atlantis (which is also located somewhere on the continent called Earth).

After the revelations by pope that he indeed is gay, there was a major uprising on the Atlantis when the extremists from the left wing of their Agriculture party decided to let the water balloon keeping the air inside the under-water continent Atlantis to explode. This was one of the 111 water balloons keeping the oxygen levels in survivable levels on Atlantis.

Among the 5600 dead AtAustralians (that's what people from Atlantis call themselves) were the exiled wrong long-lost brother of George Doubbleyou Bush Junior and the recently resigned German Bishop accused of sexual abuse of his two-headed horse.

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These bitches can't run for the ruler position, come hell or come water!
The attack was triggered by the upcoming elections on Atlantis where String The GoodFella and Bishop The Weird would have been fighting for the throne of Atlantis. Two days before yesterday (according to Atlantis calendar) Bishop The Weird admitted to having had sexual relationship with String The GoodFella which resulted in Goodfella to feel the need to protect his so-far good name. "Something had to be done and the easiest way to protect my name was to nuke Bishops balloon" said Goodfella in the recent water-interview. As a result, Bishop and all of his supporters were killed leaving Atlantis with just one potential Ruler. All others living on Atlantis are now women and current Atlantis law says that "These bitches can't run for the ruler position, come hell or come water!"

According to Atlantis enquirer, the last victim of a televised bitch-slap saw the attack from his cellar through the eyes of a multinational television, confirming the claims of this devastating attack.

The party of the 111th water balloon was also suspected of having nuclear weapons or there were signs that they could have some within the next century. "Obviously, something had to be done, " added Goodfella to the accusation, explaining that he's not the bad guy here.

In recent years no other such incidents have occurred. Potentially because of the fact that there hadn't been two people run for the ruler position for 32 years. Next such situation is expected to happen in 31 years. Currently there are 3 potential candidates, all 1 year old.

Until next time, reporting live, Yours, Harry TwoHooter.


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