The Ten Most Irritating Things Men Do During Sex!

(Or trying to get it!)

In the interest of fair play, let’s all concede that men have tormented women since time began!  Why should half of our world’s population continue to be annoyed with no payback?  Let’s shine a light on all men’s faults…(here my lady says, “There’s no light big enough to shine on ALL men’s faults!”)

So, let’s examine a small portion of the problem. Here are the ten most irritating things men do during sex, or trying to get it:

10) Chesthairman wants to “go Dutch”, but still expects sex!

9) This would-be lover actually notches his bedpost…before!

8) This Boy Wonder doesn’t know that most women don’t appreciate cartoon underwear. (Slogans actually spoil her mood!)

7) Batman here wants to wear a costume and play his favorite Mariachi CD (Run! Run quickly!)

6) Tell him you are specific: “That’s no to request #2, # 6 & 7, and no, God no, no never ever no, no for request #9!”

5) This lothario, he’s moving way-way-way too fast! (“Put down your video camera, Big Fella…I’m not Paris Hilton!”)

4) This Romeo wants to talk restraints, but not birth control!  (He’ll use one…but not the other!)

3) This “gift to womanhood” insists that you talk to it!

2) IX-NAY on the ARZAN-TAY ELL-YAY!!!

And finally number one thing men do trying to get, or during sex:

1)   This moron wants his pets to watch! (Ladies, yours should be the ONLY p***y in the room!)

Well, these are only some of the irritating and annoying and petulant things men do, but since you’ve read this far, here are a few additions to our list:

a)   This idiot leaves immediately…or stays interminably…depending on your mood!

b)   This liar forgets to tell you that he’s bisexual! (Did he sleep with Adam before, or after you?”

c)    Some guys want an instant rating afterwards, on a scale of one to ten! And he’s always disappointed and disbelieving, when you don’t immediately answer, “You were a 1,000!”

d)    Oedipus here calls his mother right afterwards!

e)    This guy promises you a big bang, but only delivers a crab nebula!

Men know that we are irritating.  We’re sorry!  We’re trying to change!

Men, we have to kick up our game a notch!  To keep pace with the ever-present empowerment of today’s woman, we need to download some updates on our past behavior!  The wise take heed, the foolish continue on their merry and ignorant way!

Always remember to give your women better than they deserve! 

It’s a secret for both of you that has worked since time began! 

Double true!

Word up! 

Peace out!

Tags: sex   humor   men   paris   

Politics TIME FOR LABOR AND THE AUSTRALIAN ELECTORATE TO PART COMPANY The results of the Australian elections, just held, have highlighted a number of things that, if not addressed, will spell the end of the Australian Labor Party (ALP) in terms of the party being able to retain any future support of the Australian electorate. more GILLARD KNEW ABOUT FAILED HOME INSULATION SCHEME. RESULT? FOUR DEAD AND 200 HOUSES DESTROYED BY FIRE 17.Aug 2010 One aspect of the Australian Government in which coup-leader Julia Gillard play...read A GILLARD GOVERNMENT IN AUSTRALIA? THERE IS NO SUCH THING 15.Aug 2010 The Australian elections thus far have been the most monotonous processes ever ...read WILL THE REAL AUSTRALIAN PRIME MINISTER PLEASE STAND UP? 8.Aug 2010 Australian has lots of former Prime Ministers, wannabe Prime Ministers, could-h...read COUP LEADER JULIA GILLARD MOVING FORWARD IN CIRCLES 2.Aug 2010 After two weeks of electioneering, there are signs of desperation within the Au...read AUSTRALIAN PRIME MINISTER KEVIN RUDD DEPOSED BY ALP JUNTA. JULIA GILLARD IS NEW PM WITH ALP POWER BROKERS IN CHARGE OF RUNNING THE GOVERNMENT THE US GOVERNMENT CLEANING ISRAEL’S DIRTY LAUNDRY NUCLEAR-ARMED ISRAEL CONFIRMED AS BEING A ROGUE STATE Opinion Making a half empty glass, half full A lack of confidence can breed a vicious cycle. The more you ruminate over the topic, the more depressed and often insecure you can become about it. more Telstra Bigpond - What an Experience! 11.May 2010 Have you ever tried to get your internet connected amidst incompetence and inef...read How to overcome the tension after a personal tragedy 15.Apr 2010 All of us would experience some kind of a tension some time or the other in o...read Primary Colors 14.Apr 2010 I wrote this article because it upsets me how cruel humans are toward each othe...read Israel and Palestine: The World compelled to Listen 11.Apr 2010 As the Israeli–Palestinian conflict has become more and more difficult to repor...read

Travel TRAVELWISE TRAVEL ADVISORY 5th June 2010. DO NOT TRAVEL TO ISRAEL. 5.Jun 2010 Given the recent incident whereby the Israeli intelligence agency, Mossad, used...read more TRAVELWISE. 16 APRIL 2010. EUROPEAN TRAVEL ALTERNATIVES 16.Apr 2010 Travelwise issues the following advice in relation to cancelled flights to, fro...read TRAVELWISE 6 APRIL 2010. AUSTRALIAN AIR TRAVEL. THE BEST WAYS TO TRAVEL BY AIR IN AUSTRALIA. 5.Apr 2010 Regular readers might have seen and read the various advisory and no-fly notice...read TRAVELWISE 2 APRIL 2010. QANTAS. 2.Apr 2010 Some concerns have been raised in relation to some of the maintenance practices...read TRAVELWISE TRAVEL ADVISORY. 14 DECEMBER 2009. DO NOT TRAVEL TO IRAN. 14.Dec 2009 Given the political and human rights situation in Iran, Travelwise advises pote...read Sport No Payoff From the Playoffs $16.50 will Get Anyone in the Hall Mr McGwire Stupid Athlete Tricks Technology Top 9 cool laptop accessories for laptop geeks Twittering: I'm not that interesting Cheers Jesus' Answering Machine Brown Couch or twelve midgets in the town square How To Be Happy Drugged Out Saturday Nights Muslim Decapitation: Bad, or Simply Misunderstood?

jingle says on 2010-06-09 18:40:41 about about men i'm a female but i don't agree with this article...most men are good in bed and pleases their women becoz they want to hear complimentary words of how good they are! that's a man thing they want to be praise...that's what men are being made!

Hahaha Dumb says on 2010-05-23 13:22:14 about Men do this Wow your sooo retarded! You prob had guys like that cause of one, your ugly, bad personality, or just plain ditsy like your dumb article. If there is one thing that guys are turned off by you women is your lack of intelligence, and all your bullshit sobbing and drama!

scottya says on 2010-05-06 03:52:06 about what the hell does - IX-NAY on the ARZAN-TAY ELL-YA - mean?

Marin says on 2010-05-06 01:44:27 about pig men hi,Im a 18 year old male and i think that its wrong what males are doing in this world to there life's and wife's. it makes me wanna go back to adem and eve and BOOT! him in the teeth lol

idiot says on 2010-05-04 01:16:00 about calling oedipus implies he wANTS to fuck his mom after, cause oedipus killed his dad and fucked his mom, but without knowing. that was a retarted refference

Jonathan says on 2010-05-02 05:40:22 about The most annoying thing women do during sex ... is nothing.

judge says on 2010-05-01 16:08:51 about ...... Wow....I suspect the article writer is a virgin. Those points were really dumb and not even true. It was also written poorly. Ya, as If i want my dog in the room when having sex....what a joke! Now I'm irritated.

jj says on 2010-05-01 03:17:20 about haha men who do these things are friggin retards.

RUSerious? says on 2010-05-01 02:03:27 about men do are you serious? who the hell sleeps with people that do these things?

oh haii ^^ says on 2010-04-29 16:53:39 about men do Do ya think ya could possibly write the article, like, you know, WELL?? The points are okay but so badly written, it makes me want to cry. I don't refer to men as 'boy wonder' or 'batman' or whatever. AND SAYING STUFF LIKE IXNAY IN CAPITAL LETTERS DOESN'T MAKE YOU SOUND COOL, it makes you sound retarded. :) x

BigT says on 2010-04-29 11:26:39 about Bullshit!

joe says on 2010-04-29 10:28:48 about this crap article

S b says on 2010-04-28 18:59:25 about Style good article but your style of writing is very obnoxius Romeo here.. Oedipus here.. boy wonder here.. try changing it up a abit

cool says on 2009-06-24 19:59:31 about men do? i think that this guy who wrote this is stupid men do way worse things than that. Trust me i know

Emdee says on 2008-11-05 05:04:25 about Myself Very good

meme says on 2008-04-17 09:38:15 about ugle people why do they have ugly people

Sam says on 2007-06-15 00:50:27 about men do Ah Lue. You've got 'em guessing! Well done.

bloke says on 2007-06-14 18:26:30 about a hazlenut in every bite what a pile of crap this article is

Guy says on 2007-06-14 11:53:33 about men do? Did a woman write this article? I suspect the writer had help because no man is this sensitive, unless he's gay. I read his other article on 10 most iritating things women do during sex and it's hard to believe the same person wrote both. Who is this guy?

	Post Comment    Your nickname    About what    Your comment   Are you human? How much is 1 + 2?