We Shoulda Known About Ex-Congressman Foley!
This article belongs to In Search of Laughs! column.
Our American politics do make for strange bedfellows.
And then, they feel the need to cover it all up! It's time for a change! Here's
my Top Ten list of reasons WHY we all shoulda known about Mark Foley:
disclosure form shows he owns 10,000 shares of Pottery Barn!
public Foley leans right, but in private, he dresses left!
8. He showed everybody the butterfly tattoo on
his left buttock!
7. In high school drama class, Mark played the
lead in "Lolita!"
6. Magazines in Foley's Congressional office
included: Tiger Beat, Seventeen, and Boy's Life!
5. The vast collection of lotions and
lubricants on display in his office!
4. Olympic Ice Dancing simply brought Markie
3. He bought an original J. Edgar Hoover sundress
2. Foley gave his CSPAN speeches wearing spike
heels and that special red toenail polish!
1. There were SO many notches carved
into his mouse pad!
The wheels of justice grind slowly sometimes. Sometimes Congress grinds even slower! Gosh
gee! It looks like I have more reasons. Somebody stop me, I can't stop giving
you nine more reasons. Stop me! These are a bonus:
We all shoulda known about Ex-Congressman Mark Foley
9. He throws a baseball like a girl!
8. He only Tivo's Will & Grace
or Mr. Rogers!
7. He wears a Prada jogging suit, with matching
6. At Bush's Inaugural Ball, he was the only
one wearing a hoop skirt!
5. He was the only man alive to OUT-BOWL k.d.lang!
4. Foley frequently touches his "pager"inappropriately!
the Boy Scouts!
2. During a Republican fundraiser, Foley heard "YMCA"¯ by The
Village People, and then ran shrieking to
the dance floor!
1. Mark Foley had three cabana boys...and NO
I am Lue Deck
The Comic in Red Shoes
And I approved this message!
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