It has been revealed that the Gordon Brown Government is endorsing former UK Prime Minister Tony Blair to become EU President.
In a move that will be fiercely opposed in Europe, current UK Government ministers are lobbying behind the scenes on Blair's behalf.
Latest from The Cheers MUSIC
NewNobility Genre:Indie New Nobility peace-rock band
http://myspace.com/newnobility...
Rad Wolf Genre:Other Hailing from Fort Worth Texas, Jacob Shelton makes music in ...
JO&CO Genre:Acoustic Five diverse musicians who bring their own style to everythi...
Shannon Corey Genre:Pop Mix together some Tori Amos, Fiona Apple and Ben Folds to ge...
I tried to ramp up for this list. Sadly, it wasn’t too much of a stretch. Most men might agree with me, but not out loud.
Women, God love ‘em, are the operative factor in continuing our species’ dominance of the planet.So we can’t get rid of them.
But the females in our lives manage to throw monkey wrenches in the spokes of our grandiose plans. Since recognizing a problem is the first step in fixing it, here’s a roadmap of the bumps ahead.
The 10 Most IRRITATING things women do during sex are:
1.She gets mad if you change channels back to the ballgame. (This is great for now, but Barry Bonds hits next inning!)
2.She wants to play her favorite John Tesh or Yanni CD. (I cannot do my business…listening to those shmucks!)
3. She is always UNCOOPERATIVE in a moving car! (Look, we’ve got cruise control, and NOBODYcan see!)
4. She burns a candle, but absolutely REFUSES to videotape. (I taped over our wedding video, but don’t hold a grudge!)
5. She always takes so, so long! ("Ooh, ooh, I want to come too!" I just hate that!)
6. She always forgets to restock the batteries! (There’s stuff I don’t have enough energy to keep doing!)
7. She complains too much about that "SIZE" thing! (I can’t help it if that “big feet-big hands” thing is a myth!)
8. She refuses to wear the mink handcuffs I bought her. (No, I won’t let her put them on ME, I don’t trust her!)
9. She forgets, as usual, to bring a DAMN TOWEL! (It’s not my fault that we…OK; it really IS MY fault!)
10. She won't ever let her girlfriend join in the fun. (I only asked twice, now she’s gone all Oprah on me!)
These are merely a few of the things women do. Men however, do thousands of more irritating things just to get a woman IN their beds. In gambler’s parlance: This bet is always a PUSH!
If love is blind, then love happens to be deaf and dumb too! Your silly shortcomings are no better, or worse, than hers. So back off your pre-conceived agendas in the battle of sexes and just enjoy what you’ve got, while you’ve got it!
anon. says on 2009-09-14 02:04:41 about Uioornlinef rpharmeti
hasnt evidenced himself reference currencies partner novelty tested
mikey tyson says on 2009-07-08 10:16:59 about rabbits
i like rabbits.. do u?
clemensgirl12 says on 2009-07-07 14:53:04 about ten most
What a pig! Is it really so hard to just stick your cock up that tight pussy?! Man, just stop complaining because it's not even funny! Do up and down motions (i know i love that) Have a fucking good time and if the guy doesn't cum all over you, then what's even the point of having sex in the first place. OMG! My favorite place to have sex would have to be the shower! Women, if your guy isn't cumming all over you yet, give him an awesome blowjob and suck his penis in your mouth for ever! This conversation is making me so HORNY!
clemensgirl12 says on 2009-07-07 14:46:04 about ten most
What a pig!
lady tygrave says on 2009-05-05 07:09:52 about 10 Most Irritating Things Women Do During Sex
omg thats hilarious cause for any man to actually be like that wouldnt get far with me i want a man to take his time and appreciate i enjoy pleasing hiim as much as i like my toes curled i feel for u dude ur sex life must really suck.
Ashlee says on 2009-04-21 19:54:53 about Sex Experience
I love giving head to both men and women. The natural body odor that comes off of individuals before during and after orgasm is extacy (unless it is very old). Though it does depend on chemical matches. I've licked my boyfriend's armpits and have not been able to get enough of my own vagina's fluids. I'll admit it, I smell my own underwear. Naughty, naughty. So sex smells and tastes can be very enjoyable.
My favorite masturbatory toy is the smallest one I have. Penises and vaginas are muscles. The more a muscle exercises the stronger it becomes. It's been proven that women who masterbate more increase pussy control and therefore have better sex. The more sex you have the better sex gets, if you are a woman, believe it for your benefit. And the better it gets for your partner. So size does and doesn't matter, and a loose woman is likely not a promiscuous one. Though women who have sex against their will repeatedly may become incapable of orgasm & therefore less toned. Or the opposite could occur and the vagina may involuntarily tighten for fear of penetration.
Women v.s. men as lovers, as was mentioned before, depends on personal preferences as much as who you've been with in the past. If the first time I went down on a guy or a girl they had some skunky-funky smell or taste going on, I would be more likely to enjoy the sex opposite of the smelly one, for instance. I personally have had good and bad woman-on-woman experiences as well as good and bad woman-on-man experiences. So they even out. You're probably attracted to the sex that pleases you most and none of us can control who we're attracted to... this is why we are attracted to people even if we know they're bad for us or even if we don't actually like them or the things that they do. Men and women aren't that different.
My favorite sex act was to use one of my toys on my boyfriend (who is straight) from behind. Without any stimulation, I came when he came, because I thought it was the closest he could get to experiencing what a woman's orgasm is like and I fantacized about how much he enjoyed it, so I enjoyed it just as much. Men have 50% less nerves in the penis than women do in the clitoris, and I thought maybe the prostate stimulation could make up for that, that was my reasoning. So, a lot of people whether gay or straight are experimenting with anal... and if a girl is grossed out by pleasing her man intensely, she may want to reconsider her perspective.
I'm capable of coming every 30 seconds, with the right person. With certain people I haven't come at all. I'm a screamer and I don't fake a thing... in fact I lost a boyfriend over it because he didn't like it. (He called himself the "silent assassin.") So there are very sexual women out there who mean what they say and don't bullshit like this artical humorously insinuates. Though I'm learning (just recently) that my experiences are not the norm... that there are sadly women who have gone their entire lives without orgasm. I, myself, am so sensative I have cum hard and repeatedly from my partner licking the hollow spot just below my lip (mouth lip)... as though it were connected directly by a nerve to my clitoris. Vaginal contractions and all (he checked, initally disbelieving). And I have to make him stop licking it because it becomes too much to bear. I get wet just by touching the spot under my lip and feel weird in public for doing so... actually a while ago before I knew this, I got it pierced, my labret, and I surprised the professional who was doing it because I orgasmed right there on the table. So... not all women are not-so-fond of sex. I lost a boyfriend, in fact, who was convinced I was using HIM for sex.
Hopefully this helped someone... and girls out there who haven't cum yet... don't give up. It's worth it. You might want to look into some squirting videos... where females are capable of literally and visibly ejaculating... this is my personal goal... perhaps if you're open-minded this can be your inspiration, too.
Also... one reason why a girl's vagina would be too tight for a man is due to the stress of the girl... I've been so stressed out before that tampons hurt. There have also been rare occasions where I've lubed up a dong and slowly sat on it with more pleasure than pain. Women's vaginas are capable of childbirth whether or not their frame was built for it (sometimes childbirth breaks hip bones or tail-bones of mothers-to-be, but the vagina is capable). If a girl has anxiety about the sex or even anxiety about the penis going in for whatever reason, or about being too loose or by not being a great performer (yes, girls get performance anxiety, too) ... this can prevent women from enjoying sex, being comfortable with their bodies, and becoming opened up enough to fantasise and create their own orgasm... as orgasm cannot happen without conscious sexual fantasy, in men or women. Then there are just women who don't have enough testosterone to understand sexual desire. Also, the libido of men and women changes all throughout life, much like vagina size. A 70-year-old highly sexually active woman can be just as tight, if not more tight, than an 18-year-old who's never masterbated or done voluntary or involuntary kegals. (To break another myth, the loss of virginity isn't a painful experience for every woman and usually is mainly painful due to fear of pain and therefore vaginal tension.)
For men who find loose women who they really care about... it wouldn't be wrong to break it to them gently that your parts simply don't yet match, but that they can do something about it... or that you could do something about it together, for example, by you taking a dildo and pushing it in her and then by she consciously focusing on pushing it out of her by clamping down... this can be done until the dildo shoots out a distance with little effort, or you could bring her to orgasm by giving her a little resistance. Say, it's in and slowly moving out... and you push it back in until it slowly moves out again... and you push it back in, etc.
Women who have never cum may want to try increasing their muscle tone & seeing if that makes a difference.
Men may want to research how big the clitoris really is. The nerves spread from the clit down and out and around the vagina. Orgasms also can make a loose women tighter.
I had a boyfriend who used to give me chick-head (which he loved enough to volunteer to do for long periods of time) as he would make me cum every 30 seconds or so he'd stick his finger inside of me and feel my orgasmic contractions and be amazed... until I felt so full with that one finger I had to ask if he was using 2... and then after tightening me up he would enter with his penis and we would have some of the best sex we'd ever had.
Also, I've given a man a blowjob and caused him to cum for the first time by blowjob... women who are afraid of blowjobs... watch some porn and try to get used to the idea... when you do it, it's fun to imagine that your mouth is a vagina, and your goal is to get him off... so get into it, don't be afraid of looking stupid, and suck that cock as long and hard and fast as you need to. Learning to relax your gag reflex can maximize his pleasure... my ex liked it when I would swallow his cock. I always got some noise from that. When you're going slow, licking the outside, thumping the head against you, or popping it in and out... you must know... this is foreplay. You've got to speed it up. If it helps, pretend he's really fucking you, and you're getting close to cumming, and go wild.
And no teeth, rings, etc.
Also, I've gotten a female to cum from cunnilingus, and it was the first orgasm she'd ever had, though experienced. A good tip for men that generally speaks for all women is... don't go at random rates of speed or pressure... try to ease up to it... at first, go slow. Lap at it. Start from the bottom up. Then concentrate on the clit if the women isn't too sensative for direct clitoral stimulation. (I was with a boy once who didn't know what a clit was. If you don't, it's in your best interest to learn as only a very small percentage of women unfortunately can orgasm from penetration alone.) I like small circles and up & down motions. Remember to go slow and speed up gradually. Women start low and need to be worked up, like a glass of water filling and then overflowing; it can't overflow until the water rises. Make sure you've found the clit and aren't performing on a mistaken region. Some women's clitorises go to the left or the right, just like penises... in this case, they need special treatment. You might want to look at it first. When the women gives you signals of enjoying what you're doing... I know the first urge of yours is to speed up quick... DON'T DO IT... this will throw her off of her game. When she shows that she likes it and you can tell she's reaching climax, DO WHAT YOU'RE DOING. Just keep doing it. If it doesn't get her to cum, again, very slowly, increase speed and then stay at that speed when you can hear her getting close. Another tip... if you want to do the butterfly thing (which is my personal favorite) and stick your finger in during girl-head... and if you're going to move your finger... try to move it in and out with the same cycle of motion you're using with your tongue, so that you work all-together as a team. It can throw a girl off to have random jabs at her.
Yeah. :) Well I put way more than I intended to. I do have a life, I promise.
I'm very curious to see if my information was wrong. I know everything's general, but if these techniques don't work for certain girls or guys, I would love to find out the way they like to be licked.
P.S. Enjoying anal doesn't make a straight guy gay! And guys who give girls anal, women don't have prostrates; don't go searching for it, and give her plenty of clitoral stimulation to keep her cumming. And certified anal lube, not vasalene.
And for first-timers... it won't take long for you to learn that you can not take it out of the ass and put it in the pussy without nasty consequences no-matter how clean it looks. Try different condoms to prevent itchy, smelly, painful bacterial vaginosis or infection.
Doctors can be expensive.
:) hehehe
susana says on 2009-03-09 22:43:56 about wow
ok.. Wow i am Just 14 and i think that u guys have no BALLS
justme says on 2009-01-31 22:22:54 about
fuck the towel....just don't complain when we use your shirt instead
aissa says on 2008-11-13 01:33:56 about about this!
If you are trying to be funny.. Loved it.. But I kinda felt like you were a lil serious.. If thats the case.. you are a selfish pig.. If you are not.. you are hilarious dude!!
Tit says on 2008-10-24 16:25:24 about 10 Things
Now heres the suprise, most of you lot cant actually construct a sentence - grow up the lot of ya, its one persons opinion not the be all and end all of the world - if you dont like it go elsewhere. And yes I am female.
kayla&annlisa says on 2008-10-10 13:22:37 about sex
yall are all nasty old people that need 2 get laid and life!!!
mensclothes says on 2008-09-07 21:06:57 about
Go to www.shop.collegelearner.com for the hot mens clothes that will help you hook up more with women..
homosaywhatt says on 2008-08-08 13:25:22 about fuckface
hah.
you're lamee.
emmy says on 2008-05-20 10:25:02 about sex
yo all i need to say is that you need to stop talking junck about peoples fucking mothers because i will lick your ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
kiki again says on 2008-04-13 15:53:55 about yo momma
yo momma so stupid so though she was fat and ugle when she was ha ha
coolerthan you/kiki says on 2008-04-13 15:50:30 about about what
i fell like eating eating chicken oh chicken are so great and potate salad just kidden yoo you momma so fat she though jar jar fits with pickles pickles yo momma fight anyone else bitches
coolerthan you/kiki says on 2008-04-13 15:49:56 about about what
i fell like eating eating chicken oh chicken are so great and potate salad just kidden yoo you momma so fat she though jar jar fits with pickles pickles yo momma fight anyone else
kiki says on 2008-04-13 15:44:43 about chickens
you fucking dumb asses mark-ass bitches what ever we were talking about i just feel like cusses
kiki says on 2008-04-13 15:43:11 about sex
you fucking dumb asses
morgy says on 2008-04-01 10:00:46 about this is not funny
dumb fuck. this wasnt funny at all.
MANDI says on 2008-03-31 09:58:56 about 10 THINGS
K WOW WHAT A DICK.YOU DONT ASK UR GIRL TO GET HER FRIEND TO HAVE A 3SOME WITH YOU.
MANDI says on 2008-03-31 09:58:46 about 10 THINGS
K WOW WHAT A DICK.YOU DONT ASK UR GIRL TO GET HER FRIEND TO HAVE A 3SOME WOTH YOU.
MANDI says on 2008-03-31 09:58:31 about 10 THINGS
K WOW WHAT A DICK.YOU DONT ASK UR GIRL TO GET HE FRIEND TO HAVE A 3SOME WOTH YOU.
lisa says on 2007-06-01 03:53:01 about 10 most irriating
you are just not funny,here i thought i was gonna read something good but what a load of trash,lets see the fun you'l be having when i ask if i can bang your best mate while you wiating for some action from
Jill says on 2006-12-13 20:14:22 about ten things
Obviously, the writer told several jokes on himself, at least he's fair. You dudes should chill
Shell says on 2006-11-28 13:13:00 about true
But that is just how women are and if you can't except that then that is on you guys
a real man! says on 2006-11-10 18:36:10 about 10 things
this is the worst thing i have ever seen! why don't you guys grow some balls and appreciate how wonderful she really is!!!
Bobbi says on 2006-06-06 19:59:39 about 10 most
I laughed the whole way thru! Nice one!
JamesDean says on 2006-05-28 13:58:04 about 10
the topic is fine, just u're not funny
Jim says on 2006-05-28 10:52:26 about
meh...
yanni tesh says on 2006-05-28 10:26:03 about
deaf and dumb? i didn't realize it was 1950, you stupid fuck. maybe you should throw in a negro reference to stay timely.
Winnie-the-Poop says on 2006-05-28 07:53:27 about 10 most irritating...
U left out the #1: TALK
ragoovian says on 2006-05-26 15:34:17 about 10 most irritating
Dude, your lame humor really sucks.
Willie says on 2006-05-26 12:46:45 about What a cack
Good one Luke! I am now feeling so much more educated : )
sadie says on 2006-05-24 14:23:54 about ten most
Men are such.....men! But what can you do?
It was funny tho!
