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When you are working as an entertainer, especially with a circus or other traveling show you are bound to hook up romantically with another performer once in awhile. Sometimes the only people you can even find to talk to are the folks in your production and you have no choice but to date another person in the biz.

I had only a few on-the-road romances in my time with the circus. I can’t say that any of them was earth-shattering or exciting, at least not any more so than any other relationship I’d had. However one story always comes to mind first and foremost when thinking about love under the big top.

Someone had a BIG crush on me. It was more than just a school-girl kind of attraction. It was a full-on, gotta have him, double-whammy of an obsession. Although we never dated and rarely saw each other, she was in LOVE with me.

She was a nice girl, but not my type. Were it not for the fact that we would occasionally work together I’d have never given her a second glance. She had bad breath and poor table manners. We never had an intelligent conversation. She had a mannish quality about her and she had no sense of style at all. She was of decent breeding, but otherwise would be considered “common stock” by most men. She was not attractive. She was too hairy, too stupid and too short. She was a baboon.

Irvin Hall came from a long line of circus performers. He had a couple good working acts. Aside from a unicycle act, he had a very good animal attraction; a baboon act. It was one of his baboons that fell in love with me.

You didn’t think I was talking about a real woman did you? Oh my God! What kind of animal do you think I am? I suppose it doesn’t matter because this baboon DID in fact think I was an animal and she had to get with me.

I’ve been fortunate enough to work among wild animals often over the years. I’ve encountered elephants, tigers, chimpanzees, and all sorts of exotic birds among others. Until I’d worked with Irvin, the only baboon knowledge I had was leftover from my Ringling days.

Clowns are told to AVOID BABOONS AT ALL COSTS. To a baboon, a clown is just another baboon, thanks to the clown make-up. Baboons are quite territorial and aggressive and when they see a clown they have only one instinct; kick the clown’s ass!

I’d always made it a point to be very respectful of the animals on a show regardless if I was wearing make-up or not. I would never try to pet them or engage them in any way. It is just common sense to treat them like wild animals and not as pets. More importantly, they were not MY animals.

With Irvin’s baboons I didn’t have to worry as much about being mauled. These were smaller, and did not have the same colorful faces as the larger, more aggressive baboons. Besides, I had long since hung up my clown togs by this point and since I never went out of my way to become chummy with another performer’s animals I felt quite safe.

My first meeting with Irvin started this unusual tale of love and infatuation. I went to Irvin to learn what behavior was appropriate around his animals and where it would be best for me to set up my gear. During our discussions he would “introduce” me to his baboons by calling out their names.

The first two baboons could care any less about me. The third baboon (I forget her name. I know, TYPICAL MAN!) was quite taken with me!

You could see a physical transformation in her face as she stared into my eyes. She became quite star-struck and her eyes were wide open. She was clearly excited to be around me. By all accounts it was love at first sight for this young lady.

At one point she left her seat and followed the length of her tether until she was positioned behind Irvin’s leg. She’d occasionally peer around and get a little closer to me.