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-	Confessions of an Ad-man XII: Consumers in Search of Service
-	Confessions of an Ad-man XI: More Dueling With Mother Nature
-	Confessions of an Ad-Man X
-	Confessions of an Ad-Man IX
-	Confessions of an Ad-Man VII: Commercial ends up in the air instead of on the air

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There was one very dismal period in my Agency career. Nothing I wrote seemed good enough. Not good enough for the clients, not good enough for the art department. My creative ideas sucked. Even the 20-year old gum-chewing receptionist said so. Regularly.

Just when I thought my morale had reached its nadir, I was given what I considered the ultimate slap in the face. We had just landed what was for us, a major supermarket account. Arlen Foods was a medium-sized independent chain with an excellent management team and a top notch customer service reputation. I had played a part in the acquisition of the account so I assumed I was going to write and direct the campaign. Not so. This was too important for one of us “locals” to handle so the boss went to the big city of Toronto for the creative. I was to “suit” the account. For the uninitiated, a “suit” is an ad agency account executive. His job is to be verbally abused by both the client and his agency colleagues. If the client doesn’t like the campaign, he tells the suit. The suit then returns, cap in hand to the creative people. They quickly inform him that he is incompetent with an IQ one and a half points above a cucumber, for not being able to sell such a brilliant concept to his moronic client.

A further honor that the boss conferred on me was that I would be allowed to “sit in” on the initial presentation. A little salt for my wounds.

The presentation was held in the fanciest and most exclusive private club in our city. Beef Wellington and white linen. We flew in the two big brains from the east and they, along with my boss and me, made up the agency contingent. Phil Arlen, the president of the supermarket chain came by himself. This fact should have been our cue to immediately abandon any plans to impress him with jargon, rationales or airy strategies. Company presidents who come to meetings without flunkies are not impressed easily. We all vigorously ignored this warning and, after the dessert and just the right amount of small talk, the campaign was unveiled.

“The strategy here is deceptively simple,” began one of the stars from the east. “We feature you (indicating Phil) on camera, in a television commercial. The reason . . .”

“Is that you want to personalize my business,” Arlen said. “My competitors are corporate giants. I’m the owner of this company so putting a face to my company will make customers more comfortable buying their groceries from us. Please go on.”