For most people death is something that invokes fear, sadness and the idea that life is over and they will never be the same. The idea of a loved one passing away is such a devastating idea that many talk about in hushed tones so as not to bring it on their family.
What if they are wrong? What if you are wrong? What if death is actually the beginning of a new life, or a funeral the celebration of a life – instead a somber moment.
With all due respect, funerals are sad, and the loss of a loved one is heartbreaking – but if you step back and think of the person, what would you see? Would they be telling you to stop crying and start laughing? Just because they have passed on does not that mean they are gone from our hearts and minds?
I attended a funeral a couple years ago and the reception afterwards. It was a young man I knew; he had a young family and had passed quickly after the discovery of cancer. At the reception it was an amazing scene – it was a party! While he was missed greatly, his young daughter would not know her father except through stories, they were celebrating his life. There was music, dancing, stories, and more than enough food, everything he had enjoyed in his life.
Death, unfortunately, also brings people together. Family members not seen in years suddenly appear at the death of a relative. Why? But, why do we wait for death to bring us together with those we care about the most? All too often we tell ourselves that I’ll talk to them tomorrow, I’ll go visit next week – I’m too busy today. Did you ever want to take back a mean word, but were too stubborn, only to never get the chance? For some it may be guilt, while others a sense of duty.
Tell those you love that you care about them everyday. Watch your words so you do not have to live with the fact that you were never able to say you were sorry. Tomorrow is not a guarantee for any of us.
While death and the loss of a loved one is sad, remembering them in life is a comfort and they will know that you remembered them as they were, not how they died or what wasn’t done while they were here.
We never know when the time will come. It could be driving down the street and having an accident. It could be a sudden illness that was not expected, it could be anything…but it is final. Live your life every day and in death you will leave a legacy a peace with your loved ones – something they can hold on too and smile.
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