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Editor-in-chief man of The Cheers. Happily writing good and the bad and the ugly. And why not some, and then some more, nonsense in between. "Make a move.Get in the game.What, you gonna get hurt? Have a beautiful trainwreck" - Cupid, Trevor Hales


The importance of Self-Confidence


2004-11-21 09:39:30


What separates successful people from unsuccessful ones? Definitely the fact that the first ones are successful and the others aren't. The real reason for that is simple self-confidence or lack of it. Yet, it isn't just self-confidence. Some very successful business-men might be extreme wussies in their personal lives. So there must be something more to it. Success in business is measured by the amount of income, respect for leadership and reputation. In order to gain all that, one must believe in what he is doing, and he must believe in the way he is doing it, and he must believe he has the required skills for doing it. The skill of leadership is often learned through life, through living your everyday life. Different expensive courses in leadership or general university education is just extra. In business, if you feel you are good, you have made the first step and you're on your way to the top.

Success in love life

What about love? It's partly the same. If you believe you are good, you've made the first step and you have great chance of becoming a master. I'm not really talking about sex right now; I'm talking about mastering your love life. In other words: finding the women, talking, dating, keeping it cool and fresh, and most importantly feeling yourself way too good while doing it all.

What's the big difference between being successful in business and being successful in love, you ask? One thing - one main thing: Emotions! In business you don't really have to look inside of yourself the way you need to do it in your relationships with women. For mastering the art of being successful with women, you need to open up, be ready to show your feelings, be ready of being turned down, blushing without the intention, and being impulsive. If needed, even to make a total fool out of yourself, sing a serenade to your loved one or jumping off the bridge with your girlfriend's panties on your head (okay okay, you better forget about the last bit). In love, it's often a must. And one needs this kind of self-confidence to succeed with women.

Why?

Some of you may say I am what I am. If she doesn't like me this way, she can go and screw herself. The truth is that maybe she really does go and play with herself a bit. But that doesn't hide the fact that you'd have to do the same then.

So what do women want to see? I bet you've already read loads of articles that go into this topic far more deeply than I could ever do. I'll still say one thing loud and simple: It's self-confidence! Women do not want to see a guy who isn't sure of ANYTHING - that's the truth! Period. Another harsh truth is that this is exactly the impression that many men leave to women.

Neither do women want to see guys who have the type of impression in their face like she's talking to someone else, she doesn't like me. Oh poor me, oh poor me... I say: Oh poor women who have to deal with this type of guy. Get over yourself! Go out there and start acting like a man! Talk to the girl, be funny, show you're interested. A soft slap in your face isn't always bad either.

Self-confidence, not arrogance

There's one thing you should keep from though: Don't make a mistake between self-confidence and arrogance. One doesn't mean the other. Self-confidence doesn't mean you have to act like a prick who believes he can do anything because he's just so good. Big ego is often essential quality, but only if used with good intentions. Self-confidence means knowing what to do, when to do it and where to do it. It means forgetting all the stupid questions in your head like what if she doesn't like me. What question is that? Just go and ask. There aren't any better ways to find out. How to ask is already another topic that I won't go into right now. You'll find many other articles covering this topic from this magazine.





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