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Love's Muse

 article about relationship
2004-10-22 23:27:37

Dear Craig,

I have a problem that seems simple but hard to figure out.  I am in a relationship that has fizzled out but I don't want to be the one to call the relationship off, I am waiting for my boyfriend to do it, but it's not happening soon enough.


Fizzled Out


Dear Fizzled Out,

You are currently in a situation that many of us find ourselves at one time or another.  Apparently you still love this person, but you just might not be IN love with them, and, yes, there is a difference.  You are more than likely concerned about your boyfriend's feelings and don't want to hurt them. However, the longer you stay in the relationship, the longer you are actually hurting him and yourself.  Breaking up with an individual is never an easy thing to do (thats why you have couples staying together longer than they should), but that could also lead to cheating and domestic violence because you feel like you're trapped with no where to go.  My advice to you is to sit down with yourself and think about it and be honest with yourself; figure out if you are honestly ready to end this relationship.  If you think breaking up is what you really what to do, you need to sit down with your boyfriend and express your feelings to him and let him know how you truly feel.  You never know; he might be feeling the same way as you. In any case, a lot of true feelings might come out in this conversation.  Trust me when I say that you are not the only one who has to deal with this issue, a lot of people go through this. Gladys Knight even wrote a song about it: Neither One of Us (Wants To Be The First To Say Goodbye).


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