Demon Slayer
DVD
* Directed by: James Cotten
Writing
credits: James Cotten, Michael B. Druxman
DVD
Michelle Acuna .... Alicia
Howard Williams Jr. .... Tyson
Adam Huss .... Phillip
Hanna Lee .... Claudia
R
85min
New Concorde Home Video
What we have here is a serious failure to communicate.
It's
a bad sign when a DVD menu is a portrait of the protagonists overlaid
on a matte shot of fire and a half-demon, half-woman thing in the
background.
It's a WORSE sign when the opening credits roll
looks like it was shooting for a ranking on Total Request Live.
Disjointed images roll by while pulsing death-metal music plays in the
background.
Yeah, it's about as bad as it sounds.
So
anyway, the California criminal justice prorgram decides it has a new
idea for misbehaving delinquent teenagers...send them to an abandoned
hospital in the middle of South Central Los Angeles to renovate it for
use in some other city program. Did anyone happen to mention that
people were killed, messily, by hatchets in this hospital? In fact,
within the first five minutes of the movie?
So much for cruel and unusual, eh?
Speaking
of cruel and unusual, or rather, cruel and way-too-predictable, the
movie chooses a familiar way of introducing our cast of characters.
It types them on the screen. Seriously. With matching sound effects.
Within
the first several minutes, we learn not only the character's names, but
also their dominant archetype in life. For those of you who couldn't
care less about a "dominant archetype," just use the handy examples
below.
Demon Slayer's cast of characters, verbatim (dashes are mine for the sake of accessibility):
Alicia--THE GOTH
Claudia--THE BITCH
Tyson--THE BROTHA
Phillip--THE PUNK
Tamara--THE BITCH'S FRIEND
I am, as Dave Barry is so won't to say, not making this up.
[BB]
So,
with our cast firmly cut into our forebrains, the cast goes forth to
clean the hospital up in three days. Before the work begins, they spend
some time engaging in the countercultural behaviors that got them
locked up IN this looney bin in the first place. The goth, of course,
is the one that has all the disturbing flashbacks that give us insight
into the building's history. Of course, the goth is also first to have
the hallucinations that let us know that the building is pretty deeply
haunted. Fifty billion snakes on a floor have a way of doing that.
We
also learn, the hospital has a really fearsome history. It was opened
for less than a year when the patients killed everybody in the building
including themselves. As is standard for a haunted house movie, weird
things started to happen. Doors shut of their own accord, mysterious
hallucinations take place, maggots appear in the food, and plenty of
other creepy things occur. Better still, the house spent more than a
little time as home to some truly vicious prostitutes.
Let's be
honest, folks..."Demon Slayer" is an updated "Amityville Horror," only
set on another coast, and tied vaguely into the Mexican holiday of the
Day of the Dead. It adds nothing to the genre, only replacing our
Amityville family with pot-smoking sex fiends who couldn't string a
proper sentence together without a grammar textbook and three tries.
"Demon Slayer" is a tired retread of a film we've all seen before, and
it's really rather sad. Are we so jaded, horror buffs, that no one can
come up with just ONE ORIGINAL IDEA?
Even worse, it steals a classic scene from George Romero's "Night of the Living Dead." And this is a horrible crime.
I'm
digressing a bit...there are some originals out there. Some truly
visionary pieces that owe little or nothing to anyone or anything
before it existed.
This is not one of them.
The special
features menu is a bit more robust with audio options, filmographies,
an original trailer, and closed captioning. No deleted scenes but this
doesn't surprise me. They probably needed all the film they could get
to fill in their run-time. Spanish subtitles are included, no surprise
given the subject matter. A trailer gallery is also included, with
trailers for "Treasure Hunt," "Cheerleader Massacre," and "Quicksand."
All in all, "Demon Slayer" is a terribly familiar film, and therefore, you don't really need to get your hands on it.
You've already seen it.
This
week, however, I'd like to let my readership know that I'm poised to
offer something new to the lot of you. If you've come to enjoy Reel
Advice, or just find it useful, then send me an email at
videostoreguy@columnist.com with the words "The Advisor" in the subject
line. I'll tell you all about it.
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