The Weighting is the Hardest Part--The Fallout 2008-07-02 It seems even with the World Wide Web at our disposal, we could not ascertain a credible answer to that question. Although, it should be noted that this bet was made at Wrigley Field after both he and I had been radically over served, so it could be ..read on
Ipod, You Pod, We All Pod for Ipod 2008-06-04
Thank you Jesus for creating nerds. And when I say "nerds", I mean it in the most flattering way…hell, the only thing keeping me from being a nerd is the lack of both usable knowledge and a good paying job, so believe me, I don’t mean it as an insu..read on
A Mother of a Holiday 2008-05-12
Some people don’t sweat the small stuff, I’ve opted to go them one better and not sweat any stuff, be it big, small, medium, or any size in between. I like to think of it as a "philosophy", but it’s really just pure unadulterated laziness. It was t..read on
A Dog\'s Life 2008-04-22 Of course, he won my wife over right away, but she’s a pushover for anything on four legs. You could bring a wild dingo into the house, turn it lose on a path of destruction, and her only comment would involve how cute he looked pissing on the drapes..read on
The Weighting is the Hardest Part 2008-04-02 I entered into this pact with two of my long time friends from high school. It may not seem like something that would be indicative of aging, but what self-respecting young man would engage in such a spectacle? For one thing, when you’re in your twen..read on
Madness Gladness 2008-03-24 Sixty-four teams go in, only one comes out, it’s the finest spectacle in all of organized sports. Sure, there are probably those that would like to debate me on that proclamation, and to those poor misguided souls I say, throw $20 into an office pool..read on
Erin Go Drinking 2008-03-17 Drinking on St. Patrick’s Day is a little like having sex on Valentine’s Day; it’s cliché and it seldom lives up to your expectations. Much like sex, the best drinking experiences are never organized efforts; they usually happen on a Tuesday when you..read on
Welcome to the Land of the Ice and Snow 2008-02-25 It’s probably unlikely the owners would even care, with their vehicles gone, they won’t have to venture out into the frigid conditions, hell, they’d probably wave at you from the window and wish you hearty bon voyage.
It’s not just cold; it’s Siber..read on
Hell Hole 2008-02-19 I’ve hit many potholes in my life, but none of those previous experiences could have prepared me for my most recent encounter. I was driving my usual route home from work, I would like to say I was minding my own business, but in truth, I was somewha..read on
Between a Rock and a Heart Place 2008-02-12 I guess it all started when Chaucer penned the poem Parliament of Foules in 1382 to honor the first anniversary of King Richard II and Anne of Bohemia. I’m not sure what "Foules" means, but I think it can be loosely translated to "Richie has to buy g..read on
Where There\'s No Smoke, There\'s Ire 2008-02-05
I just figured Chicago would get special dispensation, kind of like the Pope allowing corned beef consumption when St. Patrick’s Day falls on a Friday. In the immortal words of the late Alderman Paddy Bauler, "Chicago ain’t ready for reform."
I c..read on
Two Tickets to Paradise 2008-01-28
It all started on a Tuesday morning last October. I was driving to work in the wee hours of the morning, actually, it was 8:08am, I have proof, or one might say "evidence" of this fact. I was employing my usual "creative" method of driving, those w..read on
October Load 2008-01-21
I didn’t even care how I contributed to producing its magical, glowing warmth; I just wanted to be a part of it on some level. So it’s all the more surprising that as an adult, I seldom find the time to squeeze it into my schedule, although a big p..read on
Let It Snow, Let Them Throw, Let it Go 2008-01-14 My first thought was the usual angry, "what the hell?", then I hit the brakes.
I don’t really mind getting snowballed; it happens to me a couple of times every winter. When I was younger, it might have evoked some kind of violent reaction and perha..read on
