HOW TO IDENTIFY BLARNEY 2008-03-10 Today, October 26, 2005, the entire scientific community was set aghast by the news, Yodar Hoopelhoffer, the Mount Perry town idiot, had invented the worlds first “Blarneyscope”. With the device, Yodar is rumored to be able to separate the Straight P..read on
Ice in Mount Perry, Florida? 2008-03-30 Much to the horror of the residents of this fair town, the locals have awakened from their warm beds to find any water standing in containers outside their homes solidified.
This unusual phenomenon has been blamed on a weather anomaly called freezi..read on
PIRATES 2 2005-07-04 Douglas (Spike) Sharp Robert P. Herbst After our first dismal failure at pirating, and thanks to Spikes ability to speak like Henry Kissinger, we were able to convince the Coastal Patrol it was all an innocent prank on our part. If they wanted to g..read on
Bob From Tennessee 2005-07-04 A furniture dealer, Bob from Tennessee, decided that he wanted to
expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to
Paris, France to see what he could find. After arriving in
Paris (this being his first trip ever to the French capi..read on
Diabetes - The Other Way Of Seeing It 1978-01-01 It was back in the early part of 1986 when I sat in my doctors office and listened to him tell me I had diabetes. It was a shock but I had known something was very wrong for some time. At any rate, the doctor went on at length to tell me all about wh..read on
Instant Watermellon 1978-01-01 In recent years there have been great forward strides by the Mount Perry Scientific Community. One of the greatest of these strides has been in the agricultural field, with the long awaited announcement of the freeze dried watermelon. Doctor Eye Shri..read on
Pillars Of Salt - More Fractured History 1978-01-01 Only recently has the Mount Perry Archeological Society been able to translate the scrolls found hidden inside hundreds of clay jars, hidden deep in the dark recesses of caves found by sheep herders on the upper slopes of our beloved Mount Perry. The..read on
Alligators as Pets 1978-01-01 Little consideration is given to keeping the Florida Alligator as a house pet. There are many pros and cons to be considered before you race to the nearest pet store and buy a fourteen foot alligator to keep you company.You are going to need a bathtu..read on
The Attack Snake 1978-01-01 There are certain advantages to living alone in the town of Mount Perry, Florida. Not the least of which is the selection of a house pet. On a recent trip to the big city I visited a pet store and bought a snake. It was a neat little snake with pret..read on
In The Beginning 1978-01-01 From the geographical study our world history we all know: In the beginning, our world consisted of one land mass known as Pangea. All the rest of the world was covered by water. Right in the very center of this land mass, like a pimple on an elepha..read on
FRACTURED FLORIDA HISTORY 1978-01-01 Here in Florida we have a town called Kissimee. Kissimee is an Indian name and the story of how the name came about is at best, bizarre. When the first white men arrived here in Florida they moved inland until they met the native Indians. These Indi..read on
Mount Perry Zeppelin 1978-01-01 In the ongoing effort to improve transportation between Mount Perry, Florida and Tallahassee, the state capitol, a consortium of investors have banded together to build a secret airship they hope will guarantee cheap and reliable transportation betwe..read on
MICE 2005-06-13 I’m a Veteran, and for many years I’ve been having nightmares of things I’ve been through. I take hand fulls of pills every day to control the flashbacks and to sleep. I don’t really like to take pills and occasionally I do forget with no ill effects..read on
DIESEL BEER ICE CREAM 2 1978-01-01 Once having fulfilled my obligations in Tallahassee, I was about to go in search of another convenience store advertising Diesel Beer Ice Cream, my first effort having failed. This was indeed strange to have something so widely advertised yet so hard..read on
DIESEL BEER ICE CREAM 1978-01-01 In the years since moving to Mount Perry, Florida, I have driven many hundreds of miles both with my little family and alone. Now, as a well traveled person, I consider myself reasonably familiar with the various snack foods available along the roads..read on
BACON 1978-01-01 It seems the further North you go the better the bacon tastes. I don't know why, but it does. I had a friend down in St. Croix, in the U. S. Virgin Islands, who complained bitterly about not being able to buy decent bacon. After listening to his grou..read on
A New Sporting Extravaganza 1978-01-01 Once again it’s time for the annual Mount Perry Rhinoceros Rodeo. The entire town is aglitter with preparations for this gala event. Our intrepid big game hunter, Mr. I. Katchum has E-Mailed us from deep in darkest Africa about his efforts to find st..read on
New Mode Of Transportation 1978-01-01 In the ongoing effort to improve transportation between Mount Perry, Florida and Tallahassee, the state capitol, a consortium of investors have banded together to build a secret airship they hope will guarantee cheap and reliable transportation betwe..read on
A Stranger In Town: People From Outer Space Arrive 1978-01-01 It was only a few days ago when Yodar Hoopelhoffer, the
Mount Perry town idiot, ambled down North Jefferson Street in the
company of a A Space Ship
Over Mount
PerryA Space Ship Over Mount Perry small hairy, bipedal,
creature. It was unlike any..read on
The Pointlessness of War 1978-01-01 It was in 1984 when I first moved to Mount Perry, Florida with my
two minor children. I was retired and had little to do. I stayed home
most of the time and took care of the house. It didn’t take me very
long to realize that if I picked up a green..read on
The Mount Perry Peanut Tree 1978-01-01 It's a hot day here in the middle of Mount Perry, Florida. But I am content sitting here in the shade of a Mount Perry Peanut Tree, looking up at the cool, snow covered peak of our beloved Mount Perry. It's interesting to note that the Mount Perry Pe..read on
I JUST HATE SPIDERS 1978-01-01 In order for one to appreciate my dilemma, one must first understand that I hate spiders. Not just some spiders, but all spiders. I think somehow the spiders hate me back. They seem to always be there when I least expect them and they always get in a..read on