The Oz Journals Entry 8 - Winters of Discontent
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By Tom Nicholson, Cartoonist






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    Winter outdoorsmen (and women) in Canada also affix oversized wooden and catgut tennis rackets to the bottom of their boots and leave the comfort of their warm homes. They discover to their amazement that they can walk across huge, deep snow-drifts, and that without them they would be engulfed.

    We have the Inuit people to thank for this remarkably innovative way of traversing the frozen land without becoming ice sculptures for future paleontologists to marvel over. The Inuit people puzzle me greatly. (Side note: it is no longer politically correct to refer to these gentle Arctic folk as Eskimos, which translated means “Your mama wears mukluks”; evidently a bit of an insult) I cannot fathom why they remain living there. Surely they cannot enjoy that kind of weather. They have six months of summer, but summers up there are like Buffalo winters. And then they have six months of winter, which I imagine would be like spending a year on the dark side of the planet Uranus. It must be hell on your body clock if you work the midnight shift in “the land of the midnight sun”.

    There is a common misconception that the Inuit still live in igloos. The only reason an Inuit person will construct an igloo nowadays is when he is unable to locate his home after an extremely heavy snow storm. Apparently, the aluminum siding business does a roaring trade up Tuktayuktuk way.

    They seem to have all the amenities; they have McDonalds too. Go to Antarctica and you will no doubt find the Golden Arches. I can only imagine the food at an Inuit McDonalds. I would lay odds that eating a McCaribou sandwich with a small pemmican on the side has to be healthier for you than eating a QuarterPounder with cheese and a small order of fries. The Inuit even have satellite television, which means they must know; they have to be aware there are more comfortable climates on this planet to reside, and that these places aren’t really so far away. And yet they stay.


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    AUTHOR: Tom Nicholson

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    Suze




    Suze says on 2006-01-31 21:01:10 about Winter
    Well, Thomas.... I personally hate winter. As you know, I live in British Columbia, Canada and we have had almost no snow this year (unlike the waist high stuff we usually get). I don't miss it, not even a little. I would be forever happy if it snowed for 1 week every year during Christmas week and no more. Perth sounds like a little bit o' heaven to me.






    Tom Nicholson




    Tom Nicholson says on 2005-12-24 04:42:18 about Dullsville
    Well, actually, I live in Perth now, and hope to stay here. Since I originally come from Toronto, Canada, a city which turned into a monstrous megacity virtually in front of my eyes over the past twenty years, I find Perth's laid back lifestyle and tranquility refreshing. Given the escalating crime rate and pollution and other evils back where I come from, dullsville or not, so far I love it here. I would like to read your story on it though, if you want to share it with me...






    LaurenJaye




    LaurenJaye says on 2005-10-20 20:48:36 about Perth's climate
    I live in Perth, just wondering if you enjoyed your stay here? We have often been called "Dullsville" due to the lack of things to do here. Especially after business hours in the city. Once the office-workers go home the city becomes quite dead, there aren't even many homeless people around - thats how boring it is! I had to write a story about it, so would be interested to hear your point of view...thanks.









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