The Pointlessness of War
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By Robert P. Herbst, Writer






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    It was in 1984 when I first moved to Mount Perry, Florida with my two minor children. I was retired and had little to do. I stayed home most of the time and took care of the house. It didn’t take me very long to realize that if I picked up a green willow stick and waved it at my children in a threatening manner while speaking in a loud, stern voice, I could get the kids to do almost anything I wanted them to do.

    For some reason this gave me a feeling of great power over the kids and I became a dictator in my own home. I began thinking; if I used a little bigger stick and spoke in harsh terms to my neighbors, while brandishing my stick, they might likewise be encouraged to bend to my whim. In the woods behind the house I found a nice three foot long hickory rod about 3/4 inch in diameter.

    I began carrying this around under my arm. After this, when I spoke to my neighbors, I spoke in harsh terms and held my stick up in front of them as I spoke. The effect was as desired and expected. My neighbors at first looked at me with disbelief, but as I held my stick up firmly in front of them they began to submit to my will.

    Thus in short order I became dictator of my neighborhood. Now I returned to the wood lot behind my house in search of a larger stick. This stick was about the same length as the other one but it was an inch in diameter and it had a large knot at the end. I took my new stick back to the house and carefully cleaned and polished it.

    Now as I walked up to the border of our neighborhood and met the people from other neighborhoods, I again spoke in harsh terms and displayed my stick. With the backing of the people in my neighborhood, I usurped other neighborhoods. I imposed taxes on my new constituents. With the tax money I hired an army. Granted, it was a very small army but as I usurped more neighborhoods my army grew accordingly.

    As dictator of several neighborhoods and with a very nice taxation system in place I used some of the tax money to build myself a castle. From my new castle I issued orders to my lieutenants who now carried small sticks of their own. However, I made absolutely sure my stick was always bigger than anyone else’s stick.

    If one of them showed up with a stick bigger than mine, I immediately broke it in half and would allow them to pick up only one half of the original stick. This effectively quashed any thoughts of revolt or reluctance to follow my orders.



    Continued On Next Page (star wars, Page 2) ...


    AUTHOR: Robert P. Herbst

    TAGS: Entertainment                           

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    Dee Dee




    Dee Dee says on 2005-03-02 15:19:59 about Thw poinlessness of war
    I wish he would come to my neighborhood with a stick and some trash talk. He would learn his lesson real fast!









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