Our American politics do make for strange bedfellows. And then, they feel the need to cover it all up! It's time for a change! Here's my Top Ten list of reasons WHY we all shoulda known about Mark Foley:

10. His disclosure form shows he owns 10,000 shares of Pottery Barn!

9. In public Foley leans right, but in private, he dresses left!

8. He showed everybody the butterfly tattoo on his left buttock!

7. In high school drama class, Mark played the lead in "Lolita!"

6. Magazines in Foley's Congressional office included: Tiger Beat, Seventeen, and Boy's Life!

5. The vast collection of lotions and lubricants on display in his office!

4. Olympic Ice Dancing simply brought Markie to tears!

3. He bought an original J. Edgar Hoover sundress on E-Bay!

2. Foley gave his CSPAN speeches wearing spike heels and that special red toenail polish!

1. There were SO many notches carved into his mouse pad!

The wheels of justice grind slowly sometimes. Sometimes Congress grinds even slower! Gosh gee! It looks like I have more reasons. Somebody stop me, I can't stop giving you nine more reasons. Stop me! These are a bonus:

We all shoulda known about Ex-Congressman Mark Foley because:

9. He throws a baseball like a girl!

8. He only Tivo's Will & Grace or Mr. Rogers!

7. He wears a Prada jogging suit, with matching bra!

6. At Bush's Inaugural Ball, he was the only one wearing a hoop skirt!

5. He was the only man alive to OUT-BOWL k.d.lang!

4. Foley frequently touches his "pager"inappropriately!

3. He always wanted to be in the Boy Scouts, and I mean specifically:

"IN"� the Boy Scouts!

2. During a Republican fundraiser, Foley heard "YMCA"� by The

Village People, and then ran shrieking to the dance floor!

1. Mark Foley had three cabana boys...and NO cabana!

And, as the old saying goes: " If you don't like Ex-Congressman Mark Foley...you should see the folks that elected him!" Let's do better next time.

I am Lue Deck

The Comic in Red Shoes

And I approved this message!