The British and Their Genitals

USA says on 2012-02-11 19:55:05 about vuHXiuQXfzPBlJKm

OgWTPf I must admit, the webmaster has written cool..!

GranjN says on 2008-02-16 09:29:53 about jULI ARTICLE

BOUT TIME YOU WROTE ANOTHER PIECE!!!!!

Mike says on 2007-03-20 12:11:25 about Pah

If it wasn't for the likes of the aptly named Mongor we would have so much less to laugh at. Keep up the good work but leave Juli alone.

Willie says on 2006-02-15 07:49:51 about Bloody Hell...

Poor girl. You bunch of nancies. She was just trying to have a bit of a laugh, and you all come down on her like an off kipper at breakfast.

May I suggest you all lighten up, stop being so goddam nasty and get off your high horses? Just a suggestion.

Racist? I live in Japan, and I tell you, things I say sometimes DO shock people here because it's a different culture. I have known plenty of British people who shocked me. Like Juli was saying, she's not speaking for everyone - take those words, think about them, and retreat into your dark hole of un-fun.

Dick Moran Morecock says on 2005-11-19 06:24:30 about words for genitals

Julie:
Your article on genitalia was truly penetrating. However, you appoached the subject too indirectly--I think you should have approached it Head On.
Your article was quite entertaining.
I'm sure your pussy is quite nice too.

Jocky says on 2005-03-15 18:50:06 about Oh dear

This article has been dragged up from the 1950's, where did you find it? Have they not taught you about plagiarism at school? The sad thing is you are trying to be ironic but you have no idea what ironic is. Now im off to admire my penis for a bit, sorry is the correct anatomical phrase too funny for you? wanker

Nat says on 2005-03-04 09:03:45 about whoops

AnaMarie: I meant your attack on Juli was foolish.......

......spent too much attention on my spelling instead of my references : )

Nat says on 2005-03-04 05:55:44 about whoops

AnaMarie: I meant your attack on Juli was foolish.......

......spent too much attention on my spelling instead of my references : )

Nat says on 2005-03-04 05:42:07 about Brilliant stuff

First let me say what brilliant and hilarious article which reminds me of many British friends and makes me proud of my English roots as well ………even if they are a hundred years old or so.

Secondly – Mongor & AnaMarie: I finally have proof of what I have long suspected – there exists a small secret society bent on undermining one of the most endearing traits of the British, their humour. My nickname for this society is BWH (Brits Without Humour), however, you may want to enlighten us with the official name if I haven’t already hit upon it. I have information, although tenuous, that this society is linked to another secret order known as BWHNTAM (Brits Who Have Not Travelled Abroad Much). I also suspect you may belong to LBOBE (Lets Be Offended By Everything) the scourge of modern society, taking the fun out of living. Now to each of you in turn:

Mongor: My English routes are in my GPS, shows impressive travelling throughout the UK and the world, nothing to be proud of really as the computer does all the work : )
I expect that you are confusing the term Brit with the term Pom (equivalent of Yank). In my experience (5 years of living in countries with large British Expatriate Communities) Brit is a term proudly used, Pom is never uttered. Just as I am proud of being called an Aussie, but abhor being called a Convict. To be honest I can not fathom how you can be offended by being referred to as a Brit – it is the first four letters of the word British, something I assume you are proud of? I also beg to differ that the writer is being prudish or immature. Using highly comical & inventive names for anatomical parts does not make one so. Even though I can say vagina and penis, who would want to? They are clinical and do no flow off the tongue like dong bits and willy. It also beats what I use to call them in Oz before living in the UK, c**t and dick are coarse and not very pretty. Just like saying ‘shagging’ instead of ‘rooting’ but then perhaps I should be saying having intercourse – sounds too much like a visit to the doctor if you ask me. You state that you are a fan of slang yet refer to Juli’s use of such as childish and immature. It seems you are straddling the fence, you shouldn’t stay that way for too long it might have lasting effects on your nuts.

AnaMarie: How can you say naivety is offensive – I suggest you look the word up to see what it means, perhaps you should have used the word sad instead (see for correct usage). Also, who uses the words/terms: lame, wow, darling, oh my and silly? I mean really, where do you get off going on about someone else’s use of interesting names for genital areas when you obviously speak like you live in an Ab Fab episode. Five years or so ago you could have been forgiven for it, now it’s just plain sad. Your attack on Suzanne was just foolish. You seem to be looking for offence where there is none. I do not understand how you can refer to her as racist – perhaps you see invisible words on your computer screen…….I’d be a bit worried about that – if the voices keep talking to you, don’t listen. I’d like to add that if you were from such a well bread family you’d be a bit stale by now – boom boom (as Basil Brush is so fond of saying – wouldn’t want you to misconstrue my meaning and think the reference was to a terrorist threat or anything)

Juli: Would love to know when we can expect another article from you? Can’t wait to strain those face and belly muscles from all that laughter, I need the exercise so don’t make us wait that long.

Keep up the good work : )

Granjan says on 2005-03-04 04:34:43 about Article

Juli I am your mother in law You only had to ask!!!

Mongor says on 2005-03-03 21:06:30 about

I'm shocked and mildly impressed that you were able to use such a word in your last sentence Juli. I'm almost embarrassed for you. It did seem like a forced effort but I appreciate it.

As far as your opinion of not continuing to read something you feel you have a contrary opinion too I have this to say. I find value in hearing what people have to say and wouldn’t be so narrow minded as to stop reading. I won’t, however, pursue this thought as it isn’t relevant to my point.

Addressing Suzanne I would have you know that I am male and (as I previously said) am English, being born here and having lived here all my life. To me, someone who is in every way British I tell you that I find being referred to as a “Brit” derogatory. As you and Juli seem so eager to point out, this is of course my opinion, I don’t pretend to speak for everyone… only those British people I call my friends. Ok point made what was next? Ah yes.

Juli, as for the comment made about your apparent racism I would have to agree. To say that the British are capable of making comments that would “Make most nationalises stop in their tracks” was a very sweeping statement. If that isn’t a hugely ignorant generalisation then I don’t know what is. I guess I’m particularly sheltered having never heard a North American refer to their genitals with anything but polite words. It must then mean that it’s just us Brits, who are so foul mouthed, probably the bad dentistry.

This was never a personal attack, you wrote an article and I had something to say, if it bothers you “have the sense to stop reading it”. I feel obliged now to inform you that although you may not live in the UK now it shocks and surprises me that anyone who ever has thinks that “knickers” is slang for genitals when it is in fact female underwear or “panties”. Knickers are plural though so if you care for the meaning of “knicker” it would be one pound sterling. I hope that helps.

At this time I have nothing more to add but I’ll be happy to address any problems you have with this post of mine in due time.

Suzanne, you inspired me to take a moment and check my spelling. I hope you approve. Perhaps you’ll take on board what I have said a little better now that you don’t have to worry about my spelling.

Juli says on 2005-03-03 19:48:14 about Oooo er missus

Wow ladies, I just thought I'd check on the comments and am completely surprised at the contents of them.

Of course I understood that there would be people who didn't agree with me which is why I said I didn't profess to speak for all of them. I also understand that not everyone would enjoy what I'd written.

I have a few points to make. Firstly if I didn't enjoy a piece that someone had written I would probably make my points in a succinct manner outlining the areas I disagreed with, if I felt the need to comment at all. Personally if something I'm reading bothers me so much I have the sense to stop reading it, always an option although obviously not a popular one.

Secondly if I did feel the need to comment, I would not make it a personal attack as I'm not sure what sort of person would do that. The piece I wrote was a light hearted, tongue in cheek commentary. I did not think it would be taken verbatum or used as an accurate representation of how the 'Brits' deal with any issue, god forbid we are now perceived as being uptight or prudish, that just wouldn't do! What next, the world might think we have bad dental work, unhealthy cuisine, or spend all of our spare time in the pub. My point is, if you didn't like it please feel free to comment but I'm not sure why you would feel it is your place to call another person lame (that's just plain ignorance and who but a prepubescaet youth uses the word 'lame'?) I'm also totally dumfounded about the label of racist.... not sure about that one. Perhaps I should be calling the British people, 'people of Viking, Anglo Saxon, Celtic, Roman, immigrant
descent'.

For goodness sake, don't make it personal, that is small minded and quite frankly nasty, agree to find it not your cup of tea and move on.

Of note, I am quite capable of using the correct anatomical terms but have found in my quite extensive experience in North America, that when I meet North Americans they comment on the variety of slang terms used by their British friends for their genitals and they always, always mention our use of the work 'knickers' (hope this one fits into your criteria of suitable vocab). I therefore thought it would be amusing to expand on this by producing something that would make people chuckle, it was not meant as a political/feminist/vegan/alien abduction diatribe and quite frankly if I was person with such strong views as yourself, I would put my considerable talents to positive use by campaigning on behalf of a cause that really deserves it instead of wasting my valuable skills on spewing out drivel on a piece on an online magazine.

Also I would make the blindingly obvious suggestion that you make a point of not reading anything I write again, which I'm sure you'll feel obliged to add some venomous comment about redundantly reiterating the point I have already made. I'd hate for anyone to get their clitoris in a knot over this or any other articles I might write.....

Juli says on 2005-03-03 19:47:40 about Oooo er missus

Wow ladies, I just thought I'd check on the comments and am completely surprised at the contents of them.

Of course I understood that there would be people who didn't agree with me which is why I said I didn't profess to speak for all of them. I also understand that not everyone would enjoy what I'd written.

I have a few points to make. Firstly if I didn't enjoy a piece that someone had written I would probably make my points in a succinct manner outlining the areas I disagreed with, if I felt the need to comment at all. Personally if something I'm reading bothers me so much I have the sense to stop reading it, always an option although obviously not a popular one.

Secondly if I did feel the need to comment, I would not make it a personal attack as I'm not sure what sort of person would do that. The piece I wrote was a light hearted, tongue in cheek commentary. I did not think it would be taken verbatum or used as an accurate representation of how the 'Brits' deal with any issue, god forbid we are now perceived as being uptight or prudish, that just wouldn't do! What next, the world might think we have bad dental work, unhealthy cuisine, or spend all of our spare time in the pub. My point is, if you didn't like it please feel free to comment but I'm not sure why you would feel it is your place to call another person lame (that's just plain ignorance and who but a prepubescaet youth uses the word 'lame'?) I'm also totally dumfounded about the label of racist.... not sure about that one. Perhaps I should be calling the British people, 'people of Viking, Anglo Saxon, Celtic, Roman, immigrant
descent'.

For goodness sake, don't make it personal, that is small minded and quite frankly nasty, agree to find it not your cup of tea and move on.

Of note, I am quite capable of using the correct anatomical terms but have found in my quite extensive experience in North America, that when I meet North Americans they comment on the variety of slang terms used by their British friends for their genitals and they always, always mention our use of the work 'knickers' (hope this one fits into your criteria of suitable vocab). I therefore thought it would be amusing to expand on this by producing something that would make people chuckle, it was not meant as a political/feminist/vegan/alien abduction diatribe and quite frankly if I was person with such strong views as yourself, I would put my considerable talents to positive use by campaigning on behalf of a cause that really deserves it instead of wasting my valuable skills on spewing out drivel on a piece on an online magazine.

Also I would make the blindingly obvious suggestion that you make a point of not reading anything I write again, which I'm sure you'll feel obliged to add some venomous comment about redundantly reiterating the point I have already made. I'd hate for anyone to get their clitoris in a knot over this or any other articles I might write.....

Suzanne says on 2005-03-03 19:34:14 about Comments - AnaMarie/Mongor

Hold on girls, are you British or just know people who are?

I was born and bred there, and proud to call myself a Brit and know many, many others who are just as proud to say the same thing.

Have you not heard of the Brit Awards?

Keep replying though, you are hilarious, we are all enjoying your words (and spelling) very much indeed.

AnaMarie says on 2005-03-03 18:11:00 about Ohhh Suzanne

LoL you really are a bit funny in your reply. My favorite part ofcourse is when you say

"I was brought up using many different words for ALL of my private parts and anyone who used anything different were thought of as being from a lower class of family or not very nice."

Perhaps you missed where she said

"I’m sure you’re all familiar with knob, cock, prick and dick"

.....Wow! thats classy and upperclass. I wish i could be from such a well bread family. My god, the woman cant say Vagina. Thats not being polite, its being just plain silly.

"I have British friends that will say things that make most nationalities stop in their tracks"

Wow, racist arnt you? LoL, yes love you can be racist agains your own nation, although we can hardly call you Engilsh can we.....

Mongor says on 2005-03-03 18:02:36 about ...

First point, I, a resident in the UK, infact in England and a residant my entire life, am unaware of anyone from and residing in the UK who would ever refer to themselves as a "Brit". To me that term is as dorogatory as I imagine most americans would find the term "Yank". This point alone makes me doubt how in touch with your British routes you are.

The article i found far from ammusing, it disturbs me to think that there are grown women who are so immature and ill educated that they feel uncomfortable using proper words. I am the first to praise the use of slang, and i am proud of my vocabulary. I think to deny bioligy is frankly borderline insane.

It makes no sense whatsoever to feel so ashamed and embarassed that you cannot ever use (in front of a medical professional) the biologically correct term. It is not a rude word, it is the chosen word to define the area.

I'd like to hope that my Great Grandmother wouldn't be so ashamed to use appropriate terminoligy and activly seek childish alternatives.

Personally being a fan of slang and not an impolite person i would describe areas using other words, however, this does not mean i am incapable of using the correct names when appropriate.

Good day

Suzanne says on 2005-03-03 17:57:16 about Comments on above article.

I feel compelled to reply to the comments from AnaMarie and Mongor.

I am originally from the UK, now living in North America and have always been proud of the British sense of humour and readiness to have a bit of fun and so was greatly amused by the article on the British and their Genitals.

This article struck home for me because I was brought up using many different words for ALL of my private parts and anyone who used anything different were thought of as being from a lower class of family or not very nice.

I am absolutely sure that your Great Grandmother would be appauled at the very thought of saying the word Vagina and I for one think the British quirkiness is one of our great attributes and would hate to see anything different.

This article was great fun, if we cannot laugh together and at ourselves then we Brits really have lost a vital part of our uniqueness and that really would be lame!

Good work Juli, I, and my friends look forward to reading more of your amusing articles.

Suzanne says on 2005-03-03 17:09:21 about Comments on above article.

I feel compelled to reply to the comments from AnaMarie and Mongor.

I am originally from the UK, now living in North America and have always been proud of the British sense of humour and readiness to have a bit of fun and so was greatly amused by the article on the British and their Genitals.

This article struck home for me because I was brought up using many different words for ALL of my private parts and anyone who used anything different were thought of as being from a lower class of family or not very nice.

I am absolutely sure that your Great Grandmother would be appauled at the very thought of saying the word Vagina and I for one think the British quirkiness is one of our great attributes and would hate to see anything different.

This article was great fun, if we cannot laugh together and at ourselves then we Brits really have lost a vital part of our uniqueness and that really would be lame!

Good work Juli, I, and my friends look forward to reading more of your amusing articles.

AnaMarie says on 2005-03-03 15:33:50 about Oh My

Darling, are you 14? Your nievity is astounding, and quite offensive to anyone in England born after 1900..... Wow....

I hope the readers know that, apparently, lame people exist from all over the world, including England. Silly little girl. You make us all look bad.

AnaMarie says on 2005-03-03 14:01:33 about Oh My

Darling, are you 14? Your nievity is astounding, and quite offensive to anyone in England born after 1900..... Wow....

I hope the readers know that, apparently, lame people exist from all over the world, including England. Silly little girl. You make us all look bad.

Mongor says on 2005-03-03 13:35:29 about

Not only are you incredibily stereotypical (and it's a particularly bad stereotype) in your opinions and veiws of us "Brits" (a term most of us wouldn't like to be known as) but your ignorance rivals that of an 11yr-old child.

One point i feel i have to mention is of a word with a completely different meaning "across the ocean" The word in question is of course fanny. While your North American friends would be refering to their bottoms when using this word, in the UK would be reffereing to the "front bottom" ;)

Would you portray all Brittish people to be as prudish as you? Even my 99yr-old Great Grandmother I'm sure would have no problem using the word vagina, which you find so taboo.