Addictions Anonymous, 10: Dark Feelings

More on topic
Suggest new related link
  Code (6640A):  
Url:  



Article published on 7th June 2005 in LIFE          










UK GOVERNMENT SUPPORTS WAR CRIMES ACCUSED FOR EU PRESIDENT
It has been revealed that the Gordon Brown Government is endorsing former UK Prime Minister Tony Blair to become EU President. In a move that will be fiercely opposed in Europe, current UK Government ministers are lobbying behind the scenes on Blair's behalf.

  Latest from The Cheers MUSIC
NewNobility
Genre: Indie
New Nobility peace-rock band http://myspace.com/newnobility...

Rad Wolf
Genre: Other
Hailing from Fort Worth Texas, Jacob Shelton makes music in ...

JO&CO
Genre: Acoustic
Five diverse musicians who bring their own style to everythi...

Shannon Corey
Genre: Pop
Mix together some Tori Amos, Fiona Apple and Ben Folds to ge...

The Fireman's Daughter
Genre: Acoustic
The Fireman�s Daughter is a female Americana duo based out...

Bruce Unger
Genre: Alternative
Bruce is singer/songwriter in a folk/country vein, reminisce...

The Simple Pages
Genre: Indie
Above all else you must know about us is that we are three g...

Hearts in Pencil
Genre: Indie
"Taking folk and stamping it through a new wave filter, thei...

Hail Animator
Genre: Indie
Hail Animator is the result of a brainchild of four peopl...

FRIDAY
Genre: Indie
shoegaze-rock-ambient Is this a lost Creation Records relea...


Addictions Anonymous, 10: Dark Feelings

Article by
Retired clinical psychologist

Euphoria is a good word that today has a negative meaning; it is often used to describe the artificial high or altered state of mind produced by an addictive trigger. It’s earlier meaning was joy, excitement, enthusiasm, and exhilaration. Euphoria derives from a Greek word euphoros, a word that refers to healthy elation. I like to use euphoria to refer to a natural joy in living, its original meaning. This normal, day-in and day-out happiness seems to be missing in people vulnerable to addiction. Most addicts simply don’t know how to have fun. We should be able to get up every morning looking forward to the day’s activities. We ought to be able to take pleasure in the simple acts of daily living, from our friends and from the work we do. You probably know people who are like this even if you are not.

When simple joy in living is missing from daily life, it can be recovered though abstinence and by following a selfish program of personal growth. If you are an addict, I suggest you set that as your ultimate goal. Learn the skills and attitudes that will afford natural relief from the dark feelings described below. Learn how to practice the ordinary euphoria that is your right. This will take time, but keep the goal in mind.

So far, we’ve covered three of the necessary factors leading up to addiction: triggers, risk factors and attitudes. This article considers another broad range of important human behaviors that I call dark feelings. These, too, seem to be a necessary part of the chain in the development of any addiction.

Addiction begins with a risk factor and becomes a reality when an effective trigger creates the addictive altered state or high. A lot happens in between a risk factor and the trigger in order to make the person vulnerable to the mind-altering effects of the trigger.

People who are likely to become addicted seem to be unhappy and emotionally miserable much of the time, and seeking relief from depression through addiction is not the same as having real fun. The addictive trigger relieves this chronic discontent almost immediately, but, of course, the cure is temporary and the price is high. The trigger produces a strong contrast effect, an elevated mood or altered state of mind making it seem as if it was a miracle cure or wonder drug.

The discovery and use of a trigger, whether a substance or an activity, is an honest attempt at self-medication. We all want to feel good; our United States Constitution tells us that the pursuit of happiness is a basic goal of democracy. Unfortunately, deliberate mood changes obtained by addiction are a false happiness.

When it comes to the chronic unhappiness that dark feelings create I again ask the reader to think in the broadest possible terms, to lump very different looking emotions together because they have a common element or role to play in the development of an addiction. And the range of unpleasant human emotions is huge. Once more, not every addict shares exactly the same emotions just as not every addict shares the same trigger or the same risk factors. What addicts share in common, what makes them all brothers and sisters together, are risk factors, dark feelings, self-defeating attitudes and triggers of one kind or another. No two addicts are exactly alike and yet they share the same general patterns. They can also, by the way, come to share the same recovery program.

The part emotions and unhappiness play in addiction is important for two reasons. First, emotions can change, transform themselves and morph into different emotions. Anger, for example, can turn into depression, and depression can lead to feelings of persecution. Jealousy can turn into anxiety, fear can turn to anger, and boredom can change to frustration and yearning.

The second reason for taking an inventory of feelings and being able to recognize various kinds of emotional misery is simply that it doesn’t have to be that way. Once recognized, dark feelings can be changed. Emotional suffering is unnecessary. And this is a primary characteristic of a good recovery; one is no longer a victim of ones own feelings, one becomes a master at controlling them and limiting the damage they can do.

Many research people who study addiction have talked about depression, a mood often relieved by a trigger. For years, alcoholics were treated for depression without dealing with the dependency on alcohol. Sometimes this helped, and sometimes it created an alternative addiction to tranquilizers. But the addict is not psychotic, not legally or medically insane. Alcoholism is not usually a symptom of some severe underlying mental disorder such as schizophrenia or manic psychosis. We have learned that addiction is a problem in its own right.

We need a more general word to describe the background mood of the addict, and mental health professionals use words like dysphoria, dysthymia and negative affectivity. In common language, and as a more useful general term, I prefer dark feelings. Such a term includes the wide range of unhappy feelings with which the potential addict lives day by day, but it does not imply some kind of psychiatric diagnosis.

[BB]

We humans, often the victims of our emotions, do have a capacity for controlling them, but it is a skill that has to be learned. Recognizing and describing your unhappy moods is a first step in learning what you can do about them in an addiction-free life. As you know by now, I like lists of possibilities. I believe in the importance of taking a personal inventory. Below you will find a list of moods that are often mentioned by addicts as their common, enduring feeling over time. Such dark feelings are relieved temporarily during use of the addictive.

Reminder: this is not a test for which some overall score is important; this is simply an inventory you can use to pinpoint various moods. Check only those feelings you experience all or most of the time and which are affected by using an addictive.

_____Feeling tired, worn out and discouraged

_____Haunted by bad memories

_____Feeling blue, tearful or sad most of the time

_____Irritated, feeling hassled

_____Bored, empty, seeing no point in most activities

_____Guilt

_____Pessimism

_____Expecting harm and danger

_____Feeling like a failure

_____Hopeless, without confidence

_____Expecting disappointment

_____Hating to depend on others

_____Constant self-criticism and self-doubt

_____Uncomfortable and self-conscious in the presence of others

_____Doubt about ability to deal with difficult situations or people

_____Doubt about your physical appearance

­­­_____Doubt about your skills

_____Feeling like you might harm others

_____Anger at being criticized, fear of criticism

_____Feeling unappreciated or unrecognized for what you do

_____Angry because the world owns you more than you get

_____Alienated from others and lonely

_____Fearful of exploring you feelings

_____Unable to express love or tenderness

_____Anxious most of the time

_____Fearful or phobic of specific things

_____Struggling with impulse

_____Resentful of any authority

_____Feeling driven

_____Tormented by the negative judgments you make

_____Always wanting to be in control or on top if things

_____Feeling helpless and ineffective

_____Everything seems good or evil, black or white

_____Unable to let go of details

_____Rage, anger or deep resentments

_____Feeling pushed or controlled by circumstance or by others

_____Tormented by automatic thoughts that pop into your head

_____Inability to predict how others will respond or behave

_____Taking everything to the extreme

_____Anger at the limits others set on your behavior

_____Always on the defensive

_____No one sees you as you think you really are

_____Always being blamed by others

_____Having no clear goals

_____Being too suggestible

_____Too devoted to work

_____Others do not trust or love you as they should

_____Lack of self-discipline

_____Constantly yearning for what you don’t have

_____Always finding fault with people, places or things

­­­_____Financial insecurity

_____Angry all or most of the time

I am sure there are lots of other ways of feeling discontented, and perhaps you can write down some that are problems for you. It may help to write a detailed description of your background emotions as an artist would paint a landscape. Share that with a counselor or group sponsor. Avoid anyone who will argue with you or who is likely to say that you should not feel the way you feel. Snap judgments are not what you need. Of course, you should not go through life feeling miserable, but for now what is important is a complete inventory of feelings.

The picture of how addictions work is now almost complete. A risk factor somehow gets translated into dark feelings, and dark feelings set you up for the emotional impact a trigger may have. The final factor that creates this vulnerability is thinking, discussed in the previous chapter. Ideas, beliefs and values can create and intensify your dark feelings to the point as which some action, any action, seems absolutely unavoidable. Sadly, that action is often ends up being the use of a trigger or addictive.

One the positive side, healthy and realistic ideas, beliefs and values can be the solutions to the problem of constant dark feelings. Overcoming addiction involves one of the most difficult and unlikely things we can do for ourselves, yet it is one of the most obvious things we can do. You can simply and literally change your mind, and only the owner can do that. Get professional counseling if you think that will help, but remember that you are the one who has to make the changes. Yes, medication may help, but while it may relieve some of the feelings, it will only make you ready to work on personal growth and change.

Next, we’ll put things together: risk factors, attitudes, dark feelings and triggers to complete the picture of the chain that invariably seems to lead to addiction.



Tags:                               




Latest stories in Life

In Trust I Trust

Leadership and its challenges

All Females are Amma here

European Aviation Safety Investigators Have Qantas Concerns

IT’S NOT A WASTE PRODUCT ANY MORE





Post Comment

 
 Your nickname
 
 About what
 
 Your comment
 
Are you human? Re-type this code - GYTDDDL
 









The American Republican Party as a Militant Minority

Fortress America: The American Love of Guns

How to Survive a Writers' Critique Group

Growing New Body Parts

The Theater of God

Creativity Requires Discipline

The Agnostic Pulpit: Toxic Advertising

The Agnostic Pulpit: The university eduation fraud

The Day the Wine Rack Collapsed

Obama and the Liberal Personality

A Gentle Death

The Agnostic Pulpit: The Unmentionable Minority

The Narcissism of the Terrorist

An American in London

Ten Reasons Why the United States Should Get Out of Afghanistan

The Agnostic Pulpit: Controlling Greed

The Agnostic Pulpit: The Truth about Christmas

The Agnostic Pulpit: The American War on Sex

The Agnostic Pulpit: Addictions

The Agnostic Pulpit: Self-help

The Agnostic Pulpit: Explaining Non-belief

The Agnostic Pulpit: Voting for the Wives

The Agnostic Pulpit: Food, Obesity, and the Quality of Life

Great American Dumb Ideas: Automatic Citizenship

Great American Dumb Ideas: Writing Contests

Great American Dumb Ideas: Debt-life

Great American Dumb Ideas: Elder Blues

Great American Dumb Ideas: Sanctity of Life

Great American Dumb Ideas: Christmas

Great American Dumb Ideas: Gang Phobia

Great American Dumb Ideas: External Identity

Great American Dumb Ideas: Atheists are Evil

Great American Dumb Ideas: Christian Sunday school

Great American Dumb Ideas: Prohibition

Great American Dumb Ideas: Designer God

Great American Dumb Ideas: Disneyism

Great American Dumb Ideas: Teleligion

Addictions Anonymous, 40: Problems in Learning Serenity

Addictions Anonymous, 39: Problems with Relationships and Sponsors

Addictions Anonymous, 38: Problems with Emotional Pain and Service to Others

Addictions Anonymous, 37: Problems with Anger and Depression

Addictions Anonymous, 36: Problems with Anticipation

Addictions Anonymous 35: Harm Reduction

Addictions Anonymous 34: Therapists Of All Sorts

Addictions Anonymous, 4: A Bit Of History

Addictions Anonymous, 5: They Sneak Up On Us

Addictions Anonymous, 7: Common Elements In Addictions

Addictions Anonymous, 6: Triggers

Addictions Anonymous, 8: Risk Factors

Addictions Anonymous. 11: The Addiction Cycle

Addictions Anonymous, 12: The Stages of Addiction and Recovery

Addictions Anonymous, 10: Dark Feelings

Addictions Anonymous, 3: An Incident on the Boardwalk

Addictions Anonymous, 2: Self-help, Professionals And The Role of Religion

Addictions Anonymous, 9: How Attitudes, Beliefs And Values Create Vulnerability

Designing America, #2: The Constitutional Convention

Designing America: Why Bother?

Designing America :- #4: Some Problems In Constitutional Wording

Designing America: #3: What Changed From 1776 to 2006?

Boris Burns The Bible

Addictions Anonymous, 1: The Challenge Of Normal Living

Addictions Anonymous: Introduction

Addictions Anonymous, 13: A Universal Secular Twelve Steps

Addictions Anonymous, 15: Living With Higher Authorities

Addictions Anonymous, 24: More On Religion In Recovery

Addictions Anonymous, 25: Normophobia

Addictions Anonymous, 27: Normal As The Gold Standard—Part One

Chapter 28: Normal As The Gold Standard—Part Two

Addictions Anonymous 29: The Way to Be, Part One

Addictions Anonymous 30: The Way to Be, Part Two

Addictions Anonymous, 33: Pitfalls In Finding Treatment

Addictions Anonymous, 31: Does Prohibition Work?

Addictions Anonymous, 23: Group Traditions And Management

Addictions Anonymous, 22: Continuing The Growth

Addictions Anonymous, 14: The Art Of Being Powerless

Addictions Anonymous, 16: The Surrender Of Ego

Addictions Anonymous, 17: Self Knowledge

Addictions Anonymous, 18: Confession, Honesty And The Open Life

Addictions Anonymous, 19: Growth Through Practice

Addictions Anonymous, 20: Asking For Help

Addictions Anonymous, 26: Searching For Normal

Addictions Anonymous, 21: Setting Things Right

Addictions Anonymous, 32: When a Friend Needs Help
Julian I. Taber, Ph.D.
Variouis pulication in research journals and popular periodicals. Two books published.

Julian I. Taber, Ph.D. is a retired clinical psychologist who specialized in the treatment of addictive behavior and is a recognized authority on problem gambling having published a number of research reports in professional journals over the years. He received two national awards for his early work with problem gamblers. His book, In The Shadow of Chance, was published by members of Gamblers Anonymous and is used in professional training workshops. Taber is currently at work on several nonfiction books related to psychology as well as satirical novellas, short stories and non-fiction articles. His articles, stories and essays have appeared in Ultralight Flying, USA Today, Editor and Publisher, The Las Vegas Review Journal, an anthology on September 11 by Sands Publishing, and in a Cup of Comfort Christmas Anthology offered by Adams Media. His essay on autobiography was published in Fulcrum Poetry 2005. Taber lives on Whidbey Island north of Seattle with a Siamese cat named Elsie.




Write for us    









NewNobility
Genre: Indie
New Nobility peace-rock band http://myspace.com/newnobility...

Rad Wolf
Genre: Other
Hailing from Fort Worth Texas, Jacob Shelton makes music in ...

JO&CO
Genre: Acoustic
Five diverse musicians who bring their own style to everythi...

Shannon Corey
Genre: Pop
Mix together some Tori Amos, Fiona Apple and Ben Folds to ge...

The Fireman's Daughter
Genre: Acoustic
The Fireman�s Daughter is a female Americana duo based out...

Bruce Unger
Genre: Alternative
Bruce is singer/songwriter in a folk/country vein, reminisce...

The Simple Pages
Genre: Indie
Above all else you must know about us is that we are three g...

Hearts in Pencil
Genre: Indie
"Taking folk and stamping it through a new wave filter, thei...

Hail Animator
Genre: Indie
Hail Animator is the result of a brainchild of four peopl...

FRIDAY
Genre: Indie
shoegaze-rock-ambient Is this a lost Creation Records relea...


NewNobility
Genre: Indie
New Nobility peace-rock band http://myspace.com/newnobility...
Rad Wolf
Genre: Other
Hailing from Fort Worth Texas, Jacob Shelton makes music in ...
JO&CO
Genre: Acoustic
Five diverse musicians who bring their own style to everythi...
Shannon Corey
Genre: Pop
Mix together some Tori Amos, Fiona Apple and Ben Folds to ge...
The Fireman's Daughter
Genre: Acoustic
The Fireman�s Daughter is a female Americana duo based out...
Bruce Unger
Genre: Alternative
Bruce is singer/songwriter in a folk/country vein, reminisce...
The Simple Pages
Genre: Indie
Above all else you must know about us is that we are three g...
Hearts in Pencil
Genre: Indie
"Taking folk and stamping it through a new wave filter, thei...
Hail Animator
Genre: Indie
Hail Animator is the result of a brainchild of four peopl...
FRIDAY
Genre: Indie
shoegaze-rock-ambient Is this a lost Creation Records relea...
Travel to Tartu and have a beer

...read

Finding the best Arizona rentals

...read

Going to Mexico? Visit Playa Blanca

...read

The Lapa Street Party, Rio de Janeiro : Where Samba is attempted by all, perfected by few…

...read

Funny Dutch language

...read

5 weeks in israel........political report from an american

...read

Arab camel joke

...read

Where the hell is Azerbaijan?

...read

Difficult day in "Holy shit" land

...read

Friday morning with Charlie in the old city of Jerusalem

...read

WHY should i? Continue reading
Alien Abductions Continue reading
No qualification? Good at tech? Then go into tech! Continue reading
Prophecy: Don't support Far East Organization Continue reading
My face, the Chuas and their astigism Continue reading
Axes of Evil Continue reading
Schizophrenia Help Continue reading
Where is your conscience, America? Continue reading
Hyflux to blame for Singapore's dry dirty weather? Continue reading
Dyslexia Help Continue reading









ADVERTISEMENTS
Anxiety - Anxiety, Depression and ADHD related information.



The Cheers magazine: About us | Contact us | The Cheers Story | Advertising
Work with The Cheers: Writers guide | Write for us | Writer application | Reporter application 
The Cheers:Terms and conditions | Privacy policy | Sponsoring | Sitemap
Sister sites:Thoughts about | Free online stock market game | Wifi hotspots and wireless laptops | Brand Lady 
Listen: Online radio station | Unsigned musicians | Music reviews | Listen to unknown bands
Travel World: World travel locations | Morocco Agadir travel
Travel: Travel blogs | Travel destinations | Hotel reviews | Beer around the world
Watch: Watch movies online | Watch free tv online | Watch heroes online
Trade: Virtual stock market | Fantasy investing competitions | Free day trading tips
Learn: Business videos online | Business networking | Business strategies | Business ideas
Copyright © 2004-2009 The Cheers magazine / Addictions Anonymous, 10: Dark Feelings &