A flood of divorce announcements have hit the celebrity news wires recently. And
with every announcement comes the analysis, the “why didn’t we see this
coming” or the “it’s taken a long time for them to finally admit this.” Of
course, the couples, who used their happy marriages to promote their
movies and other projects now beg the public for “privacy during their
difficult times.”
We’ve watched our favorite celebrity couples fall in love. We’ve watched their “denials” of any relationship. We’ve then seen their massive engagement rings. We’ve watched their wedding specials on television and marveled at what an unlimited budget can buy when you’re in love. And then of course, we’ve watched it all fall apart. The couple starts spending time apart. We
see one half making a movie with someone else and then we see them at
dinner with someone else and the next thing you know the tabloids start
with the rumors of a split. Those rumors must be denied, of course. Not too long after the tabloids start with their drivel, we find out, it’s true, the fantasy couple is splitting. It was too good to be true after all.
I wonder why more celebrities don’t demand or at least seek privacy during the beginning of their relationships. Back
in my dating days, the beginning of the relationship was the part you
kept quiet because it takes time for people who are dating to become a
couple and after you are part of a couple, so much of what happens in
your life changes. How you split your time
between your friends and your new partner. You begin to socialize with
more couples and your single friends and nights out on the town are
often exchanged for quiet nights at home. The details of the relationship are usually kept fairly private. Later, for some couples, come the big engagement announcements and then the excitement of a wedding or ceremony.
When real people split, that’s when we turn to friends for help. That’s when we say “I think that he’s cheating” or “I think that she isn’t the person I fell in love with.” We don’t say “please give us our privacy as we work through a difficult time.” We say “please, my relationship is falling apart! Help me fix it.”
It’s pretty arrogant
for the celebrities who broadcast every detail of their courtship and
sometimes marriage to expect the paparazzi and magazine reading public
to suddenly walk away when things get bad. When
you’ve been on Dateline NBC to show how normal and everyday your
seemingly celebrity life is at home, you should expect Dateline to want
to do a follow up on “what went wrong” with them when they announce a
sudden split – days before a much hyped wedding.
The celebrity couples I root for are the ones who keep their personal life to themselves. They don’t exploit their relationships for publicity. They do their Hollywood job and then go home to a family and the two rarely mix. Their
pictures will occasionally pop up in People magazine – but not it’s
clear that the paparazzi is stalking them and they’re not happy about
being found on their way home from the grocery store.
To Hollywood’s newly divorcing couples, I say: “Sorry it didn’t work out.” How about next time – don’t do a reality show about how perfect your lives and marriages are. It’s nothing but trouble.
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